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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on March 18, 2013 6:47 AM. The previous post in this blog was Another Papal closet, another set of skeletons. The next post in this blog is It's who we are (stupid people, that is). Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.

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Monday, March 18, 2013

You can be a walking rim shot

Unless it's some kind of joke, they're hiring a new general manager for Portland's goofball aerial tram. Sounds like a nice deal. A reader asks, "Wonder whom I have to make out with in the men's room to land this gig."

On a related note, it's probably about time for that monstrosity to need a multi-million-dollar overhaul, isn't it? Linchpin City!

Comments (11)

"managing 15-20 employees"...sounds more like a foreman than a general manager.

"Working at heights (150ft.) is required."

Thanks, but no thanks. I have a hard time climbing on my roof.

Dave, general managers get to wear suits, have a expense account and travel the globe to learn how other countries operate linchpins plus sell the travel industry on setting up a tour to ride the thing. Foremen wear hard hats and stay home and actually work.

Since TriMet's Director of WES got a nice comfy pay raise, and he pretty much does nothing all day long, why not add it to his long list of responsibilities?

It'd let OHSU subsidize WES (making TriMet look good), and TriMet could argue it is an efficient provider of services making OHSU look good for finding ways to cut costs.

Watching the tram budget guesstimates unfold was annoying, but the overall tram debate was comedy gold for Portland blogging. Remember when I challenged the city council to demonstrate the tram's emergency system to reassure Portland? Phil Stanford wrote about my idea in his Tribune column and next thing you know, there was Commissioner Sam Adams, in a snug harness, being lowered down on a rope from 150 feet up.

Of course, the demonstration wasn't really about showing Portland how safe the tram was - if anything the rescue plan looked even more ridiculous than it sounded. This was about getting Sam some publicity. In those days, if Sam had been lost in the woods, you could just set up a TV camera nearby and he would have reemerged within seconds.

Meanwhile, as the day of the test grew nearer - the day when Sam would step out of the tram car 150 feet up - I became genuinely concerned that something would go wrong. This was supposed to be a joke, yet it was going to happen, and if it had ended in tragedy, I would be blamed. I even pledged 100 bucks to charity if Sam made it to the ground safely, and thankfully for me, he did.

Ahh, good times. Maybe we should make this a tradition. Each new head of the tram has to demonstrate the emergency rescue system to illustrate the right level of commitment to the job. We could turn it into a charity thing.

Since then we've had dozens of other scams all duly noted by Jack Bog's Blog. We've had spending shenanigans of all sorts, to the point where we know what's going to happen before the first lines of BS ever leave the politicians' lips. It's almost too predictable now. All these ridiculous spending projects have a sameness to them like waves rolling in from the ocean. Maybe it's the tsunami-sized CRC project that's taken the last joy out of it. Politicians, planners and consultants running up millions just pondering something. It's not as much fun anymore.

But the tram? The tram was comedy gold. Remember when a city commissioner said it would be our Eiffel Tower? Remember when the Oregonian called Dan Saltzman a "Man of Steel" for caving in and flipping his tram vote?

We were so young back then. Remember how we used to laugh? Ahh, the memories.

You know one of these winters South Waterfront district is going to get flooded. Then how smart will all the billions of dollars put into this area of town look? Flooding is probably why only low cost warehouse type buildings existed in SoWat for so long. It used to be the Willamette Valley had several months of snow piles, and if we were to go back to a cooling trend like our history indicates very possible, low lying places close to rivers may require billions more to combat flooding. But we seem to forget our history very quickly in this country.

Bob, not to worry. Global warming will take care of any of your concerns... :)

Would have been interesting if Sam had to apply to get this job!
He could continue to be associated with the tram and all the PR with it!

Yes, the project certainly stuck it to taxpayers where it hurts. That's why I fondly refer to the aerial cars as 'silver suppositories.'

Why does the tram even need a dedicated "General Manager"? It's a wee little circuit. Can't somebody else (already on the payroll) call the maintenance crew in once a year?

Barney: "What about us braindead slobs?"
Lyle Lanley: "You'll be given cushy jobs!"




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