Book of the Week
I am Sam.
Sam I am.
That Sam-I-am!
That Sam-I-am!
We do not like
that Sam-I-am!
Would you like
an aerial tram?
We do not want one,
Sam-I-am.
We do not want
an aerial tram.
Would you like one
here or there?
We do not want one here or there.
We do not want one anywhere.
We do not want an aerial tram.
We do not want one, Sam-I-am.
Would you like one
on a hill?
Would you like one
with a pill?
We do not want one on a hill.
We do not want one with a pill.
We do not want one here or there.
We do not want one anywhere.
We do not want an aerial tram.
We do not want one, Sam-I-am.
Would you ride one
down the trail?
Would you ride one
with light rail?
Not down the trail.
Not with light rail.
Not on a hill.
Not with a pill.
We would not ride one here or there.
We would not ride one anywhere.
We would not ride an aerial tram.
We do not want one, Sam-I-am.
Would you? Could you?
To downtown?
Ride it! Ride it!
With Matt Brown.
We would not, could not,
To downtown.
We would not, could not,
With Matt Brown.
We do not want one on a hill.
We do not want one with a pill.
We do not want one here or there.
We do not want one anywhere.
We do not want an aerial tram.
We do not want one, Sam-I-am.
[with apologies to Dr. Seuss]
| Posted at 4:31 PM | Permalink |
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Comments (21)
perfect!
Posted by Gretchen | January 20, 2006 4:43 PM
Priceless
Posted by Swimmer | January 20, 2006 4:48 PM
Well... Jack missed an opportunity to use "scam", but other than that...it's quite fun.
Posted by godfry | January 20, 2006 5:13 PM
absolutely hilarious.
Posted by dawn | January 20, 2006 11:40 PM
I'm cleaning the coffee off of my poor computer. Wasn't ready for that one! I will be laughing all week-end! Your BEST EVER Jack.
Posted by karin | January 21, 2006 10:21 AM
2 Thumbs Up! Man am I ever glad I don't live in Portland any more.
Posted by Joanne R | January 21, 2006 10:38 AM
Do they serve green eggs and ham at Mr. Steak, or was Sam Adams just playing with the food before he washed the dishes?
Posted by Weishapt | January 21, 2006 11:59 AM
An excellent choice of analogy, for at the end of "Green Eggs and Ham" by Dr. Seuss, the character actually tries Sam's Green Eggs and Ham and likes them, really really likes them. So I look forward to you changing your opinion about the tram.
Ref:
http://www.answers.com/topic/green-eggs-and-ham
- Bob R.
Posted by Bob R. | January 21, 2006 12:50 PM
Don't count on it.
Posted by Jack Bog | January 21, 2006 1:04 PM
Nice work, Jack!
Posted by Lily | January 21, 2006 2:32 PM
Bob R., I'm afraid it will be a cold day in hell before Jack posts the last part of the rhyme:
Sam!
If you will let me be,
I will ride it.
You will see.
Say!
I like the aerial tram!
I do! I like it, Sam-I-am!
And I will ride it to the top.
And I will ride it without stop.
I will ride it up and down.
I will ride it with Matt Brown.
I will ride it. It's just great!
(Who pays the bill to operate?)
I love transpo multi-modes!
I will ride it with Vic Rhodes.
And I will ride it over Gibbs!
Who cares about the budget fibs?
Council says they didn't know.
Ride it now! Go Doc Go!
I do so like
the aerial tram!
Thank you!
Thank you,
Sam-I-am!
Dr. Seuss was a genius.
Posted by More apologies to Theodor | January 21, 2006 8:22 PM
Died after eating the green ham, as I recall.
Posted by Allan L. | January 21, 2006 8:30 PM
He wrote "Green Eggs" on a bet with his publisher, Bennett Cerf, who wagered that Seuss couldn't knock off a book using 50 words or less.
Posted by Jack Bog | January 21, 2006 8:56 PM
In off-tram but still OHSU discussion -- interesting story about its tort liability cap. Wonder how many of its patients know about it before they go there?
http://katu.com/stories/82699.html
Posted by curiousone | January 21, 2006 11:50 PM
On OHSU and tort liability.
Last election cycle the voters turned down tort reform for the rest of the State's doctors.
During the campaign I raised, with Marc Abrams, the tort protection OHSU doctors enjoyed.
I asked him why other doctors should not enjoy the same limits as OHSU doctors.
Abrams disputed that they had the limit and was opposed to the tort reform.
This is a perfect example of the lack of clarity coming from our newspapers.
It should have been common knowledge that OHSU doctors enjoyed tort limits.
Posted by Steve Schopp | January 22, 2006 10:04 AM
Jack, you are the top poet of Oregon, no doubt about it!
Speaking of the tram, did anyone notice the article in today's Oregonian that said former PDX Mayor Vera Katz is planning on speaking to a class at PSU about "ethics in the public sector"?
Posted by Doug in SW | January 22, 2006 11:06 AM
Dear "More apologies to Theodor" -
A fantastic flourish of a finish!
- Bob R.
Posted by Bob R. | January 22, 2006 11:46 AM
Right on. Just shove it down their throats. They'll see soon enough how great it is.
Posted by Allan L. | January 22, 2006 4:31 PM
Can't break it down any more succint than that. You need to track down an illustrator. That's a children's book I'd want to buy.
Posted by DarePDX | January 22, 2006 8:07 PM
I heard that the PATI board just authorized some illustrations for this little bit of nonsense. Someone leaked one of the drawings to me (garagewine.blogspot.com).
Posted by Garage Wine | January 23, 2006 6:06 AM
OK, don't let your head swell too big Jack, but this is the most effing hilarious thing I have read in a while! I get so frustrated with the city of Portland and their innane & costly mistakes, but to add levity to the reality of it all seems to make the medicine go down easier.
Can't wait to read what you do with "The Grinch Who Stole Christmas". There's got to be a way to work our other favorite council member into that one...."You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel..."
Posted by Sleepy | January 24, 2006 8:54 AM