"Just one more service I offer"
The Mrs. gets some funny e-mail, just as I do. Here are a few "things that stressed-out people say," as told by her recent correspondent:
1. Okay, okay! I take it back. You're not dumb.2. You say I'm a bitch, like it's a bad thing.
3. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
4. Well, aren't we a damn ray of sunshine?
6. Do I look like a people person?
7. This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.
8. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
11. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
14. I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
22. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
23. You look like hell. Is that the style now?
26. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
27. You are depriving some village of an idiot.
28. If a**holes could fly, this place would be an airport.
29. Look in my eyes... Do you see one ounce of gives-a-sh*t?
| Posted at 2:43 AM | Permalink |
|
Comments (4)
Great list. I particularly like nos. 28 and 29.
Posted by Cousin Jim | June 18, 2005 7:42 AM
My, still on the crack pipe I guess.
What part of the term "dumb sh@t" eludes you?
(my all-time favorite from an ex:
My d*cks bigger than yours!
Ouch!
Posted by Geno | June 18, 2005 11:43 AM
From that little gem of a movie Office Space...
"Looks like somebody's got a case of the Mondays"
Posted by Roger M | June 18, 2005 2:09 PM
Two more classics from song writers:
Michelle Shocked lyrics:
"In the alchemy of love some things are better left unsaid"
From Don Henley: "Better find your inner child and kick it's little ass!"
Posted by Geno | June 18, 2005 3:28 PM