LaVonne's latest: City, county division of labor makes no sense
Not to mention Metro, Tri-Met, the Port, etc. According to the city auditor, each governmental unit badly needs to make up its mind which "core services" it's going to provide, and refine and clarify the operating lines among the units.
Good luck with that. But we're willing to get the ball rolling. As best we can tell, here's an inventory of the core services of the City of Portland:
1. Developer enrichment.
2. Mainstream business expulsion.
3. Tax and fee proliferation.
4. Public employee pensions.
5. Lifestyle promotion and control.
6. Official blogs and tweets.
7. Attraction of homeless people.
8. Police brutality.
9. Construction pork production.
10. Destruction of wildlife habitat.
11. Destruction of middle class.
12. Debt generation.
13. Bribe acceptance.
14. Preaching.
15. Deception.
What are we leaving out?
| Posted at 8:47 AM | Permalink |
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Comments (31)
Smugness.
Posted by Texas Triffid Ranch | March 26, 2013 8:55 AM
What?
No Bike-landia?
Posted by oregbear | March 26, 2013 8:57 AM
What do I get this feeling that somehow the Auditor's office is going to bear the brunt of any budget cuts ... ?
Posted by Garage Wine | March 26, 2013 9:09 AM
Secret undemocratic implementation of Agenda 21
Posted by Tim | March 26, 2013 9:11 AM
Light rail. Bike lanes.
Tim, you're right, bankrupting the city for generations to come while forcing most people into third world lifestyles sounds right out of the A21 playbook.
Posted by Anthony | March 26, 2013 9:20 AM
http://www.ruderal.com/bullshit/bullshit.htm
Posted by veiledorchid | March 26, 2013 9:21 AM
How about the Creation of Government Jargon? For more see the Linchpin Director at the Office of Vibrancy.
Posted by Bill McDonald | March 26, 2013 9:24 AM
1. Urban Renewal Blight proliferation
2. traffic lane eliminations
Posted by lw | March 26, 2013 9:25 AM
How about Repurposing Talent Clusters?
Posted by Bill McDonald | March 26, 2013 9:35 AM
-Liberal White Guilt
-Righteous Indignation
-Illiteracy
-Bicycle Scofflaws living the "Rules Don't Apply to Me" dream
-Self-Righteousness
-Ruining what used to be a decent place to live.
Posted by links | March 26, 2013 9:50 AM
The Six Phases of a Project
1. Enthusiasm
2. Disillusionment
3. Panic
4. Search for the Guilty
5. Punishment of the Weak
6. Praise & Honors for the Nonparticipants
Posted by NW Portlander | March 26, 2013 9:51 AM
Painting bicycle chevrons on the street surfaces.
Can we unilaterally recognize the City Auditor as the defacto elected political leader of the city?
Posted by godfry | March 26, 2013 9:58 AM
NW Portlander,
You skipped Step 7 when the city council says, "Mistakes were made on this project. We all know that. But it is too late now to stop this project from going forward. However, we have learned from these mistakes and we want to assure Portlanders that nothing like this will ever happen again."
Soak, rinse, and repeat.
Posted by Bill McDonald | March 26, 2013 10:05 AM
I think you should invert the list priority.
Posted by David E Gilmore | March 26, 2013 10:25 AM
Oh...oh...oh...
I forgot. There's also the whole "Keep your developmentally disabled shirttail relatives employed" program.
Posted by godfry | March 26, 2013 10:38 AM
- Offical vibrancy coordinator
- Lynchpin creation and maintenance
- Annuity management for friends of Neil
- Policy development for policy development jobs
- Diversion of money to diversity
- Ultimate equity decision maker
- Employer of last resort for all of those who cannot find jobs in a competitive market-place.
- Nuturer of Randy's "tribe"
- Ministry of silly fees
- Propagation of the "Pay us something, then fix then come back and we'll talk about it" fee schedulers.
Posted by Steve | March 26, 2013 11:29 AM
- Sustainable Building Design and Disaster Competition
- No Tree Cutting Except By the City
- Division of Equity for All
- Communal Property Rights for All (part of the Division of Equity)
- Wealth Distribution (See above)
_ Department of Making the 1890s a Vibrant Reality
Posted by Nolo | March 26, 2013 11:31 AM
The latest candidate for step #7 was the Grove Hotel deal, but this could be a Step #8 where the project doesn't go forward. It just collapses.
Here's the description in WW:
The renovation agreement, struck in 2010, was heavily leveraged with public money. The PDC has already spent $3.7 million to buy and renovate the Grove Hotel, located at 421 W Burnside next to the Chinatown gate. The PDC agreed to sell it to Gold and his partners for $555,000, a loss of $3.15 million, while giving them a $2.64 million loan.
Of course, as WW reports, everybody is really upset:
"Honestly, I am not sure what it will take to get the Grove project back on track," Gold wrote a PDC project manager on Jan. 18. "I am hesitant to say that the parties are moving on to other projects and aren’t interested, but realistically, we are a little worn down by the process. To be so close […] and not execute is beyond frustrating."
Posted by Bill McDonald | March 26, 2013 11:43 AM
Does the Office of Equity fit under Deception? It kind of was created for spinning what ever social engineering seems to happen by at City Hall whenever things get too dull. Then too whenever City Hall and Metro relocate folks out of posh places like the Pearl to Rockwood along the Max boxcar trap, you can use some media spin; and it helps if you have the token spokes persons from the Office of Equity talking about how grand and fair City Hall policies.
Posted by Bob Clark | March 26, 2013 12:12 PM
Missing from the core service list is the Sam-Rand misaligned PBOT vision to get people who pay gas taxes for roads out of their cars and have them either freeload on bikes or pay just 25% of only the operating expenses and ride transit. So much for sustainability!
Posted by TR | March 26, 2013 12:28 PM
Stench and more Stenchy!
Posted by clinamen | March 26, 2013 1:23 PM
- Printing of more propaganda behavioral brochures!
- Production of T-shirts!
Posted by clinamen | March 26, 2013 1:28 PM
Oh, and how can we forget the encouragement of sycophants whose mothers still say they're cool?
Posted by Texas Triffid Ranch | March 26, 2013 1:48 PM
I can see it now:
Portland:
"Where Common Sense comes to retire."
Posted by oregbear | March 26, 2013 2:03 PM
- Providing meals at meetings to entice folks to attend.
Posted by clinamen | March 26, 2013 2:16 PM
- Banishment of automobiles, or anything with an internal combustion engine.
- Destruction of parking spaces.
Posted by DR | March 26, 2013 2:36 PM
- Destruction of streets, no more paving.
- Only paved paths for bikes and bike delivery vehicles.
Posted by clinamen | March 26, 2013 2:59 PM
intergovernmental inclusiveness charette coordination
Posted by Mike H | March 26, 2013 4:55 PM
Bill: "To be so close […] and not execute is beyond frustrating."
At times I could get behind a little execution. Re. The Grove, it sounds like Mr. Property Owner got his knickers in a twist over the homeless enclave nearby and since the City won't make everything perfect for him, he's not going to play.
It's almost as bad as the garage PDC bought and overpaid for with urban renewal money, tore down and now we're on the hook for an empty lot downtown, stuck in suspended animation.
It reminds me of a spoiled lap dog who won't eat unless it's hand-fed.
The city creates these monsters and then wonders why they aren't self-reliant or willing to be reasonable.
The city should not be in the property development business. Period.
Posted by NW Portlander | March 26, 2013 8:06 PM
The city should not be in the property development business. Period.
Agree.
The City should not be in the property development business. Period.
If they want to be a developer, they should go out on their own
and not play on our dime.
Posted by clinamen | March 26, 2013 9:19 PM
1. Slop buckets
2. Be a Felon Mayor 101 courses
3. Beautiful Art from Jack's $35. head tax contribution
Posted by BoBo | March 27, 2013 9:41 PM