You missed a cloudy morning.

Three or four gang-related shootings?

A trip to Home Despot to gather materiel for the afternoon's chores?

You missed the first half of Barcelona versus Real Madrid who just won away from home to take a commanding 7 point lead over Barca with 4 matches left. Christiano Renoldo with the winning goal. Messi held scoreless.

But don't worry. The Timbers take on undefeated KC tonight. Enjoy.

Offhand, I'd say you missed breakfast. I've been out splitting firewood and stacking it in the rack I built between the bays in the garage, but it's got too warm for that - so I switched to killing the grass that's sprouted up in the driveway seams (full-strength white vinegar is great for that).

Just now, I went here to check for dns re-routing malware: http://www.dns-ok.us/

The FBI says that if your system's infected, you'll lose internet access come July. See: http://www.indystar.com/article/20120421/LOCAL/204210350/Your-computer-may-risk-FBI-warns

At City Hall:

BPS NEWS
11 April 2012

CONTACT

Christine Llobregat
City of Portland
503-823-7007
christine.llobregat@portlandoregon.gov

Tim Lynch
Multnomah County
503-988-4094
tim.j.lynch@multco.us

Latest Climate Action Plan Progress Report shows Portland’s carbon emissions have dropped 26 percent per person since 1990
Mayor Sam Adams and County Chair Jeff Cogen share progress update on Climate Action Plan goals for Portland, Oregon

Portland, ORE. —The City of Portland Bureau of Planning and Sustainability and Multnomah County Office of Sustainability have released a two-year progress report for Portland and Multnomah County’s 2009 Climate Action Plan. The guiding document for the City and County’s response to climate change, the Climate Action Plan is a three-year plan to put Portland on a path to achieve a 40 percent reduction in carbon emissions by 2030, and an 80 percent reduction by 2050. The progress report was presented at today’s City Council meeting.

"We have made great progress toward implementation of our ambitious Climate Action Plan goals, in part because we’re creating a more connected city", Portland mayor Sam Adams stated, "But we haven't gone far enough. Toward that end, I'm pleased to announce that Portland City Council has today unanimously approved new regulations that will add immeasurably to our efforts. By January 2015, all cars in the city will be required to adopt the new zero-mileage technology; dramatically reducing our collective carbon output."

The progress report shows that total local carbon emissions continue to decline. By the end of 2010, emissions were 6 percent below 1990 levels, while national carbon emissions are up almost 12 percent over the same period. On a per person basis, Multnomah County carbon emissions have dropped 26 percent since 1990.

"Building upon our aggressive program of not paving roads, this requirement is the next logical step," mayor Adams continued, "By phasing in implementation of zero-mileage cars over the next three years, not only will emissions be greatly reduced, but Portland residents will realize substantial savings in terms of reduced auto maintenance costs, so it's a real win-win - for the planet, and for residents."

okay...I modified one of their press releases a bit...but I wouldn't put it past them. After all, the slop buckets have an 80% satisfaction rating, according to their survey.

Is this the last thing you remember:
https://bojack.org/2012/04/lunch_with_jody.html#comments

Nice catch, Gardiner. We forgot to connect the dots:

Jack has lunch with what's-her-name, the divorce lawyer, ostensibly because she's "fascinated" with him, but does she spend the time asking him about himself - as you would graciously treat a guest - especially one you're fascinated by?

No, she runs her mouth 80 to 90% of the time putting Jack into a catatonic state, that takes him 14 hours to sleep off.

But was it merely the words that knocked Jack out? Perhaps the food prepared by her personal chef was laced with something. That would explain why she was talking so much and not jamming more of it into her own mouth.

Wait, the underlings ate too, but maybe they were in the dark, or worse yet, coerced into knowingly eating the knockout drug by a tyrannical boss.

Only God knows what really happened in that office that day, but I'm just glad Jack didn't wake up in a motel room, with some bite marks and bondage scars.

Naa, that's ridiculous. It was clearly the kind of encounter where you count your balls on the way out the door, but I don't think anything nefarious happened.

I'm betting she just bored Jack into a coma. Nobody I've ever met can dominate a conversation that much without shutting down the minds of their victims. 80 or 90%? Maybe they should hook a turbine up to her mouth and generate some sustainable energy.

Oh well, this is all just speculation. There's probably nothing suspicious here.

And yet facts are facts: Jack had lunch with the divorce lawyer. Jack slept for 14 hours later that week. Those are dots that needed to be connected.

Nice catch, Gardinier.