Reader poll: Should Texas secede from the United States?
Here's a good one -- a group of gubmint-haters in Texas want their state to secede from the Union. What do you think?
Here's a good one -- a group of gubmint-haters in Texas want their state to secede from the Union. What do you think?
Comments (29)
Too bad Molly Ivins and Ann Richards are both gone.
I hope they are havin' a glass of wine and laughing.
Posted by portland native | March 6, 2011 4:26 PM
Thanks for the memories Texas! Don't let the door hit you...
Posted by Brendan | March 6, 2011 5:27 PM
Considering that every time a texan becomes president they start a disastrous war, I am pretty certain that it wouldn't be too long before they try to invade the rest of us. So despite my strong distaste, I think the world is safer this way.
Posted by Shadrach | March 6, 2011 5:28 PM
Oh, to be so brilliant.
Posted by The Other Jimbo | March 6, 2011 5:33 PM
Whether is has just been in their own minds or is an actual fact, but Texas has always been a Nation State. There has never been a major consensus that they are subservient to Washington, and the idea of succession has ALWAYS festered.
They have occasionally loaned one of their own statesmen to show the rest how to lead in a business-like manner. But it usually takes a non-Texan to surrender our values and courage.
Posted by dman | March 6, 2011 6:00 PM
Love it. Maybe it will shut the righties up when they see what life is like with no taxes, no regulations, no public education, etc....
Posted by mp97303 | March 6, 2011 6:57 PM
I vote "yes", but only if they take South Carolina with them.
Posted by ron | March 6, 2011 7:11 PM
Imagine what it will do for our national average IQ!
Posted by Tom | March 6, 2011 7:14 PM
Boy, they are going to need a huge immigration bureau to handle the people moving from the other 49 states - they practically do now. I would guess in 25 years, the Texas economy would be larger then the rest of the US.
Posted by John Fairplay | March 6, 2011 7:16 PM
I am with Texas. May I secede my Portland residence from Multnomah county, the city of portland, and the state of Oregon? I would re-register it as being part of the Great state of Texas.
Posted by Bob Clark | March 6, 2011 7:31 PM
So who would write our history textbooks if Texas bailed out?
As to John Fairplay's point, I think that depends on whether the oil companies would continue to receive the generous subsidies bestowed upon them by the rest of us, thanks to their good friends in Congress.
Posted by Roger | March 6, 2011 8:48 PM
A bit closer to home: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cascadia_%28independence_movement%29
Posted by cmj | March 6, 2011 9:53 PM
"A small but enthusiastic group of Texans gathered on the steps of the Capitol"
A few nitwits and it's a movement?
Yeah sure, it just doesn't move.
Kinda like the anarchists on May Day only smaller.
I wonder what that small group would think of Portland gubmint? :)
Posted by Ben | March 6, 2011 9:53 PM
It always seems like you're in a foreign country when you're in Texas. This would merely make it official.
And I would presume that John Fairplay's bold prediction takes into account the loss of US military spending in the state?
Posted by John Rettig | March 6, 2011 11:53 PM
Texas receives more in federal funds than it contributes. Only one of a host of reasons the remaining 49 states would be better off without that miserable place.
Posted by Conrad | March 7, 2011 5:25 AM
Texas seems like a foreign country?
I've been there many times and can't imagine what you are talking about.
How is Oregon as a state better than Texas?
Posted by Ben | March 7, 2011 6:59 AM
As Bum Phillips expresses, they got some 'tude,
'When was the last time you went to a person's house in New York and you saw a big map of New York on their wall? That was never. When did you ever drive through Oklahoma and see their flag waving on four businesses in a row? Can you even tell me what the flag in Louisiana looks like? I damned sure can't. But I bet my ass you can't drive 20 minutes from your house and not see a business that has a big Texas flag as part of its logo. If you haven't done business with someone called AllTex something or Lone Star somebody or other, or Texas such and such, you hadn't lived here for too long.
When you ask a man from New York what he is, he'll say a stockbroker, or an accountant, or an ad exec. When you ask a woman from California what she is, she'll tell you her last name or her major. Hell either of em might say "I'm a republican," or they might be a democrat. When you ask a Texan what they are, before they say, "I'm a Methodist," or "I'm a lawyer," or "I'm a Smith," they tell you they're a Texan.
I got nothin against all those other places, and Lord knows they've probably got some fine folks, but in your gut you know it just like I do, Texas is just a little different.'
Posted by Newleaf | March 7, 2011 7:01 AM
I guess they couldn't call the Cowboys "America's Team" any more.
Posted by Michelle | March 7, 2011 7:08 AM
Speaking as a longtime resident, I'm not bothered by this. Hell, I'm firmly in favor of it, because I know what happened the last time Texas became an independent country. You'll never hear it spoken among members of the Provisional Government of the Republic of Texas, but Texas joined the United States because, in ten short years, the Republic of Texas was skint. Broke. Kaput. Part of the deal, and why all of the yammering about Texas having the right to secede at any time is gibberish, was that the US pay off Texas's outstanding debts, because the Republic had ripped through money like Sam Adams.
As I said, I'd love to see Rick Perry, our current unbearable cross, and all of these other dweebs get their wish. I want to see what happens when our esteemed business "success stories" suddenly have to get by without federal funds. As with Arizona, I want to see what the big secession advocates do when they're suddenly no longer able to get Medicare to pay for their scooters and oxygen. Most importantly, I want to see Perry put in stocks and pelted with rotten tomatoes when, three years later, we have no choice but to rejoin the Union or default on outstanding debts. (We're already $30 billion in the hole and climbing, and Perry's too busy handing out federal money to college buddies and other beards.)
Oh, and Shadrach, just to pass on, most of us, native and transplant alike, don't consider Shrub to be a Texan. The natives know he's a carpetbagger who would have claimed to be from Berkeley if he thought it would have gotten him a few more votes, and we transplants at least have the decency to admit that we were born somewhere else. The only people pushing the stories of him being a good righteous Texan were the same inbred scum out at SMU who were also working overtime to remove any evidence of his coke-fiend days. Most of the rest of us know better.
Posted by Texas Triffid Ranch | March 7, 2011 8:00 AM
How is Oregon as a state better than Texas?
Well, my aforementioned level of military spending is much less per capita in Oregon, and we're certainly less dependent upon it. That always creates a significant distortion of the jobs economy.
Oh, and in spite of TTR's statement that most of them don't consider shrub a Texan, that's where he claims to come from. And I think they do have to answer for that.
Posted by John Rettig | March 7, 2011 8:21 AM
Oregonians are terribly chauvinistic. It is easy to make fun of Texas, but do the same with Oregon and people here crumble in anger.
Texas isn't that bad, the people are nice, and it is certainly a lot more diverse than Oregon.
I was looking at education statistics recently. Do you know that 8th grade test scores for Hispanics in public schools in Texas exceed both the national and Oregon averages in math, reading, and science? For all students, Texas exceeds Oregon in 8th grade math, 4th grade math, and 4th grade reading even though it is much more diverse.
Posted by Robert | March 7, 2011 9:10 AM
Don't I know it, John. The good news is that he no longer pretends to be running the ranch in Crawford. He's perfectly happy in his little haven in Preston Hollow, with fellow creep Tom Hicks (former owner of the Dallas Stars and Texas Rangers) as his neighbor. (The last time he came out in public after the Rangers made the World Series was to sign his new book at the local Borders adjoining his new neighborhood. That Borders is undergoing liquidation, and the front is loaded with copies of Decision Points. All signed, all marked "30 percent off" even before the liquidation sale, and all probably destined for shredding at the end of the sale when they can't be given away with free beer.)
Posted by Texas Triffid Ranch | March 7, 2011 9:12 AM
Oh, and if you want to have fun, look up the history of the Provisional Government of the Republic of Texas. Yet another reason why I laugh at attempts to secede is that the people pushing it the hardest always assume that they're going to be put in charge. I liken it to the Star Trek dweebs who assume that, when someone develops faster-than-light space travel, they're going to entrust it to some 400-pound Cat Piss Man who wears his unwashed Next Generation uniform every day.
Posted by Texas Triffid Ranch | March 7, 2011 9:16 AM
LOL "Newleaf" that reminds me of a Hispanic couple I met when he worked up here in the NW and I saw them again in Houston. In the conversation the Wife referred to themselves as "Texicans."
If you looked at Pre USA maps you realize Texas, New Mex, Arizona SoCal was all "Texican"
Posted by dman | March 7, 2011 10:09 AM
Secession is not unusual for TX, perhaps because it is too large, perhaps because it is not large enough following AK's statehood. As the Austin Lounge Lizards sing it:
"Our pride about our home state is the proudest pride indeed,
And we're proud to be Americans, until we can secede."
WikiP provides more information than this excerpt on the Republic of TX:
"An 'actual republic of Texas,' sometimes referred to as the 10th Congress (13th congress now in session), convenes a monthly congressional session at College Station, Texas. The republic has held public elections since 2005 and all elected officials of the government have been elected by citizens of Texas in accordance with the republic of Texas constitution of 1836 (which has never been legally replaced). Many of these members have left previous RoT groups because they do not believe those groups to be the legitimate continuation of the government of the original republic. The president is Richard Perkins, and vice president is Merle Laubach."
There was a miniscule but active rebellion centered just outside Ft Davis in 1997, which chilled without inhibiting travel through the West TX town that is the gateway to Marfa. Again, WikiP provides a history, which includes this excerpt:
"The 'Republic of Texas' is a group of individuals that claims that the annexation of Texas by the United States was illegal and that Texas remains an independent nation under occupation. Group activists draw on Tenther political thinking to advocate their ideas. The issue of the Legal status of Texas led the group to claim to reinstate a provisional government on December 13, 1995. Activists within the movement claim over 40,000 active supporters; however, there is no widespread popular support for an independent Texas. The movement split into three factions in 1996, one led by [Richard Lance (Rick)] McLaren, one by David Johnson and Jesse Enloe, and the third by Archie Lowe and Daniel Miller. In 1997 McLaren and his followers kidnapped Joe and Margaret Ann Rowe, held them hostage at the Fort Davis Resort, and demanded the release of two movement members in exchange for the Rowes. McLaren's wife, Evelyn, convinced him to surrender peacefully after a week-long standoff with police and Texas Rangers. The McLarens and four other Republic of Texas members were sent to prison, which effectively destroyed the McLaren faction; the Johnson-Enloe faction was discredited after two of its members, Jack Abbot Grebe Jr. and Johnie Wise, were convicted in 1998 of threatening to assassinate several government officials, including President Bill Clinton."
This is not the sort of history recounted in the TX State Travel Guide.
BTW, the FBI in Portland is not known for a sense of humor about secessionist inclinations.
Posted by Gardiner Menefree | March 7, 2011 10:42 AM
Dman, when my wife, who is a Texan, calls me a Yankee, I think she has in mind claiming everything south of the Mason-Dixon Line and west of the Mississippi -- nothing is too big for the Lone Star staters.
Posted by Newleaf | March 7, 2011 5:37 PM
Here is something that was circulating just after the election:
Please note that Texas is the only state with a legal right to secede from the Union . (Reference the Texas-American
Annexation Treaty of 1848.)
We Texans love y'all, but we'll probably have to take action since Barack Obama won the election. We'll miss you too.
Here is what can happen:
1: Barack Hussein Obama becomes President of the United States , and Texas immediately secedes from the Union.
2: George W. Bush will become the President of the Republic of Texas. You might not think that he talks too pretty, but we haven't had another terrorist attack, and the economy was fine until the effects of the Democrats lowering the qualifications for home loans came to roost.
So what does Texas have to do to survive as a Republic?
1. NASA is just south of Houston, Texas . We will control the space industry.
2. We refine over 85% of the gasoline in the United States.
3. Defense Industry--we have over 65% of it. The term "Don't mess with Texas," will take on a whole new meaning.
4. Oil - we can supply all the oil that the Republic of Texas will need for the next 300 years. What will the other states do? Gee, we don't know. Why not ask Obama?
5 Natural Gas - again we have all we need and it's too bad about those Northern States. John Kerry and Al Gore will have to figure out a way to keep them warm....
6. Computer Industry - we lead the nation in producing computer chips and communications equipment -small companies like Texas Instruments, Dell Computer, HP/EDS, Raytheon, National Semiconductor, Motorola, Intel, AMD, Atmel, Applied
Materials, Ball Microconductor, Dallas Semiconductor, Nortel, Alcatel, etc, etc. The list goes on and on.
7. Medical Care - We have the research centers for cancer research, the best burn centers and the top trauma units in the world, as well as other large health centers. The
Houston Medical Center alone employees over 65,000 people.
8. We have enough colleges to keep us getting smarter: University of Texas, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, Texas Christian, Rice, SMU, University of Dallas, University of Houston, Baylor, University of North Texas, Texas Women's University, etc. Ivy grows better in the South anyway.
9. We have an intelligent and energetic work force, and it isn't restricted by a bunch of unions. Here in Texas, it's a Right to Work State and, therefore, it's every man and women for themselves. We just go out and get the job done. And if we don't like the way one company operates, we get a job somewhere else.
10. We have essential control of the paper, plastics, and insurance industries, etc.
11. In case of a foreign invasion, we have the Texas National Guard, the Texas Air National Guard, and several military bases. We don't have an Army, but since everybody down here has at least six rifles and a pile of ammo, we can raise an Army in 24 hours if we need one. If the situation really gets bad, we can always call the Department of Public Safety and ask them to send over the Texas Rangers.
12. We are totally self-sufficient in beef, poultry, hogs, and several types of grain, fruit and vegetables, and let's not forget seafood from the Gulf. Also, everybody down here knows how to cook them so that they taste good. Don't need any food.
13. Three of the 10 largest cities in the United States, and 23 of the 100 largest cities in the United States, are located in Texas . And Texas also has more land than California, New York, New Jersey, Connecticut, Delaware, Hawaii, Massachusetts, Maryland, Rhode Island and
Vermont -- COMBINED.
14. Trade: Three of the ten largest ports in the United States are located in Texas.
15. We also manufacture cars down here, but we don't need to. You see, nothing rusts in Texas, so our vehicles stay beautiful and run well for decades.
This just names a few of the items that will keep the Republic of Texas in good shape. There isn't a thing out there that we need and don't have.
Now to the rest of the United States under President Obama: Since you won't have the refineries to get gas for your cars, only President Obama will be able to drive around in
his big 9 mpg SUV. The rest of the United States will have to walk or ride bikes.
You won't have any TV as the Space Center in Houston will cut off satellite communications.
You won't have any natural gas to heat your homes, but since Mr. Obama has predicted global warming, you will not need the gas as long as you survive the 2,000 years it will
take to get enough heat from Global Warming.
So, in other words, go screw yourselves. Oh, that's right. You already have!
Signed, The People of Texas
P.S. This is not a threatening letter - just a note to give you something to think about!
SLEEP WELL TONIGHT...THE EYES OF TEXAS ARE UPON YOU!
Posted by Gerry Van Zandt | March 9, 2011 12:45 PM
Gerry, I remember that note, too, and I laughed myself sick over it. Even before our current fiscal crisis, there was simply no way Texas could be self-sufficient. Even during the oil boom of the late Seventies and early Eighties, the occasional loudmouth legislator like former US Rep Jim Collins who talked about secession was slapped down by his colleagues. Sure, technically, Texas would have qualified as an OPEC nation, but we still take in more in federal money than we pay out in taxes. Besides, most of those companies listed would bail out in a microsecond if we couldn't afford to pay the tax-cut tribute we're paying them.
Besides, for the record, I'm sick to death of idiots bringing up the Texas-American Annexation Treaty. We pissed away the option for secession when we took arms against the Union during the War Between The States. These bozoids conveniently forgot that one of the conditions of surrender of the Confederacy was that the CSA rejoined the Union, and they'd be screaming bloody murder if any other US military opponent decided that its surrender didn't really count.
Posted by Texas Triffid Ranch | March 10, 2011 2:04 PM
To assume Texas would not be able to be a self sufficient nation is idiocy. A lot of reform would be need to take place before Texas could be self sufficient.
Your great United States of America isn't even self sufficient. Take a look inside your home. How many things do you own that is made in this country? How many do you own that came from a foreign country? For that matter, take a look inside your refrigerator and pantry. How many of those products came from a foreign nation?
We pissed away the right for secession when we took arms against the Union? Technically speaking, the south seceded from the Union peacefully and formed their own nation. The Confederate States of America had recognition from other foreign countries as being an independent nation. If not for a successful Union blockade the Confederate States of America would have even had military assistance from another foreign nation. The Union was the first to declare war and take up arms. The union declared war on what was considered an independent nation. It is only because the Union won the war that it is taught that it was a "Civil" war. Had the Confederacy won then history classes would be teaching it as a "Revolutionary" war.
Posted by A Texan | March 25, 2011 10:46 AM