It's been a slow news week. Aside from the Arctic Chill, there hasn't been much going on in Portland. That may pick up today, as the day before a four-day holiday weekend is an excellent time for politicians to reveal something they'd rather you didn't know. And their chums in the local Fourth Estate usually take the cue and report said bad news on the eve of the weekend.

Already Clackamas County and Tri-Met have scheduled controversial public meetings for this morning; watch for a bombshell from state or local government this afternoon. Maybe there'll be an outcome in that corruption case involving John Kitzhaber's girlfriend, or Tom Moyer will plead in his election fraud prosecution.

Since the local headlines have been few, how about some stories that sound like Portland, but aren't? Here's one that's got light rail, missed deadlines, a new bridge, and bike lanes. And here's another one, with a heavy-handed, tone-deaf Pacific Northwest City Hall coming down hard on a popular downtown business with a giant purple octopus on the front of it.

Sometimes close is the best we can do.