You've been to our living room...
I just got an e-mail from a reader pointing me to the "rules of conduct" for Portland's new Director Park. No radios, pens, Frisbees, hacky-sack, or chalk, kids. And no lying down on that bench!
Some "park."
Better yet, though, was a nickname for the new greenless facility that I hadn't heard before: "Portland's carport."
| Posted at 1:19 PM | Permalink |
|
Comments (13)
No pens? What does that even mean?
Posted by none | December 1, 2009 2:17 PM
So anything that is not excluded is allowed? For example, I didn't see any mention of prohibiting camping, urinating or defecating within the park's boundaries.
Posted by none | December 1, 2009 2:22 PM
No ink allowed, at least if your intent is graffiti. Maybe Office Humphreys can divine your intent.
Posted by Jack Bog | December 1, 2009 2:23 PM
Firearms?
Posted by Larry K | December 1, 2009 2:31 PM
Will they post the rules at the park?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1Q7cP3ij5g
Posted by PDXLifer | December 1, 2009 2:33 PM
...Just put officer Thumper's photo at the top of the rules sign and there should be no problem.
Posted by RANZ | December 1, 2009 2:42 PM
so we can't play catch , or ride a bike , but those godd-damm babies are free to race around in their strollers......
Posted by billb | December 1, 2009 2:59 PM
Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.
Posted by Snards | December 1, 2009 3:22 PM
I finally went by that park the other day. Most commercial building rooftops are more inviting than that place. White and bleak, it looks like a set from a science fiction movie.
Posted by Gil Johnson | December 1, 2009 3:55 PM
Gus Van Zant can make a movie.
Maybe I'll take my dog over for a poop! I don't see any prohibition on dogs...
What about a beer in a paper bag?
Tazer practice for the cops?
"Car port" is a great tag line!
Posted by portland native | December 1, 2009 7:16 PM
I'm not sure about hacky sack. "throwing" isn't the same as kicking, and banning this would tick off an important demographic.
You can still smoke on the sidewalk, and since there are few barriers around this tiny park, you might as well be in it.
Bonus question: Do "amplified sound producing devices" include bullhorns? Good luck enforcing that during a protest.
Posted by Oden Meter Reader | December 1, 2009 9:13 PM
Firearms?
Allowed, as the city doesn't have the power to ban them. Just ask Seattle, who's now facing at least three lawsuits for trying ;)
Posted by Joey Link | December 1, 2009 9:26 PM
Those beautiful teak benches look awfully inviting for pen and knife.
Posted by pdxjim | December 1, 2009 9:30 PM