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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on August 28, 2007 10:12 PM. The previous post in this blog was Memo to the Hillary camp. The next post in this blog is Drugs in Portland's Old Town: Everybody knows, nobody cares. Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.

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Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Portland Wet Sox? Gross!

I see that the Portland Beavers minor league baseball team has narrowed down potential new names for the team to a handful. They're all lame. In a survey that was posted here (and sure didn't last long), they listed these electriftying options:

• Green Sox
• Sockeyes
• Thorns
• Wet Sox
• Beavers

Ick! They must be joshing us. Inertia's got something to be said for it. Go, Beavers. (Via the OregonLive Beavers blog.)

Comments (17)

It gets worse. How about the Portland Homers?

I'm thinking the Portland Wood. Or the Portland Panhandlers.

How about the "Portland Lynchpins"?

How about the Portland Sweat Sox? Or the Portland Condo Foreclosers?

So if they cant be Beavers, is all gone and have to be called Brazilians or can they at least have a landing strip?

Seriously, Portland Trolley's? Trams? Linchpins?

Just realign with Milwaukee as the parent team and call themselves the Microbrewers.

It seems transparent and obvious to me that they're aiming for a showdown between Green Sox and Beavers.

The other three are stupid.

I kinda like the Green Sox... If you want marketability and a MLB team to emulate, can you do any better than The Red Sox? It seems like a good fit for the city and PGE Park's design (since the remodel, the outfield almost resembles the Green Monster) and a way to get more teens, 20 and 30-somethings in the seats. I'd buy that shirt...

The Sockeye idea is hilarious. Not a salmon variety anyone would associate with this neck of the woods...

Go Sockeyes!

It gets worse. How about the Portland Homers?

Only if you let him build condos where the skyboxes are...

oh...wrong Homer

So stupid,,,,, and the whole "Green" thing around here is making more nauceous than swimming in the Willamette in the middle of summer.

I'm surprised someone hasn't suggested
the Portland Care Sox. Because as we all know we have a large amount of people who care more than most other caring people in any other caring cities.

Just look at our city council.
Now they really care.
Ooops, I just ralphed.

All of these suggestions read like they were crafted by out-of-towners. Oh wait, what's that at the bottom of the page? Infinity Pro Sports? Based in College Station, Texas? Oh, so that probably explains the "self-deprecating" Wet Sox idea (great idea, let's further cement the idea that it always rains in Portland) or the "Nader-loving" remark that accompanies the Green Sox paragraph. Seems like they just looked up "salmon" in the encyclopedia and found a type appropriate for baseball. But hey, "Thorns" is a "hip name. Cool. Aggressive. Interesting." Definite corporate sports talk. How insulting. Tell me again why the team name should be changed?

can't do much worse than "LumberJax", which i've always thought sounded like the vaguely naughty name of a downtown gay bar.

"The Angry Sturgeon"

In reply to "dman"...snicker, no wait ROTFLMAO especially after no one got it judging by hte following comments. Okay maybe someone else did and just didn't want to go on record as laughing at what you wrote.

But I will. Maybe they could have a Nair sign replace the Toyota logo in the outfield.

Personally, I think they should be called the Portland Birkenstocks.

It appears that "Wet Sox" annoys many people who take their baseball seriously. I don't, so I think it's great. :-)




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