Thursday, June 08, 2006

Jail Blazer forever

Blazer punk Zach Randolph is at it again. Now he and his pals are busted for allegedly racing his cars down Broadway outside the Embers at 3 o'clock in the morning. Two loaded guns in the front seat, of course.

Note to Rob Kremer and Mark Wattles: Please find this fellow a new home. Sacramento or Oakland sound about right. Put him on eBay if you have to. Or make it a condition of closing with Allen that Randolph's gone first.

Posted by Jack Bogdanski at June 8, 2006 02:28 PM | TrackBack (1)


Comments

I dunno--for me, it's a tossup between him and Darius Miles in terms of who I want to see leave first. If Allen wants to know why he's losing money by the bucketfull, Zach's salary and Darius's salary would be items 1 and 2.

Posted by: Dave J. at June 8, 2006 02:43 PM

Livin' GTA, baby.

Posted by: Chris Snethen at June 8, 2006 02:43 PM

Zach and Darius -- Paul Allen's fingerprints are all over those two fine selections. Wonder which wrong choices he'll make this year -- wrong draft selections, wrong buyer for the team, wrong terms of the sale... or maybe the wrongest choice of all, not getting the heck out of here on the double.

Posted by: Jack Bog at June 8, 2006 02:47 PM

Everything I've read about the draft fills me with the inescapable dread that they are, for whatever reason, thinking about drafting another guard. I don't know why I feel this way, but that's the vibe I get from all the pre-draft talk. Hope I'm wrong, but it wouldn't be out of character.

Posted by: Dave J. at June 8, 2006 02:59 PM

I hope our bad draw doesn't preclude landing Adam Morrison. That's the one player out there who is compelling enough as a character to bring the franchise back around and at least make it interesting. The other top pick - the young man from LSU has such freakish hops that I'm afraid he'll hurt himself as he did during the tournament. If we took the Washington guard we might be doing a great thing as well, but Adam Morrison is a story line - a ticket seller. I'm not sure I like him as a person, but the attitude is dramatic - it'd be like having a pirate in town or a tough guy from the Wild West.
I'd stick with the Maryland tandem and Jack from Georgia Tech at guard. The younger flashy one has potential but Steve and Dixon are a good story, too. Oh, and Zach? You're going to have to do better than this to make the list of all-time Blazer losers. I'm still not over the player who gave the cop his rookie card instead of a driver's license.

Posted by: Bill McDonald at June 8, 2006 03:23 PM

I'm still not over the player who gave the cop his rookie card instead of a driver's license.

C'mon Bill, that wasn't even close to being Qyntel's greatest brush with the law. Besides he was driving on a freeway, not on Broadway. Surprised Zach didn't send anyone scurrying for safety. 60 mph in an SUV on a downtown street is MOVING.

As for Morrison, the temptation to move down is going to be huge just like it was last season. Paul has always valued the two in the bush rather than the one in hand.

Posted by: Chris Snethen at June 8, 2006 03:34 PM

They ought to send Zach and Bassy out on a hunting trip with Cheney. Either that or hire Steve Houze as the next GM.

Posted by: Jack Bog at June 8, 2006 03:42 PM

Zach shoots. He doesn't score, like usual. Zach lands in jail.

I guess $75,000,000 buys a lot of guns, but very little brains.

p.s. Where's the weed? You can NOT be on the Trailblazers unless you blazin', or so I hear.

Posted by: Daphne at June 8, 2006 03:43 PM

Zach lands in jail.

That's the kookiest part of the story! By the time the cops had popped the locks on his vehicle to get to the handguns, he was long gone. If the cops were getting ready to search my vehicle, you'd better believe I'd have been right there during the whole thing.

Posted by: Chris Snethen at June 8, 2006 03:55 PM

Actually, according to reports, Zach isn't charged with anything this time. His one friend who was driving got the tickets; the friend who was driving Zach's other car reportedly got away.

Posted by: Jack Bog at June 8, 2006 04:11 PM

Daphne your instincts were correct...this reported by KATU Ch. 2 "In the police report, an officer wrote that he could smell the odor of marijuana coming from Randolph." Sounds like he was staying true to the team tradition. Nothing screams "Trade Me" more than this kind of behavior.

Posted by: Kevin at June 8, 2006 04:12 PM

The rookie card/driver's license thing ranks right there with Damon claiming an illegal search in airport security. There has to be an element of humor to make my list, even if most Blazer fans aren't laughing.

Posted by: Bill McDonald at June 8, 2006 04:22 PM

There has to be an element of humor to make my list

I'll give you that. :)

Posted by: Chris Snethen at June 8, 2006 04:27 PM

Uncle Cliffy's crew pointing the paintball guns at other cars on Barbur and Front didn't turn out as funny as Cliffy thought it would.

Remember when he punched the female police officer trying to arrest him outside the bar on NW Vaughn? That place was scary. On the way in, they checked you for weapons. If you didn't have one, they gave you one.

Posted by: Jack Bog at June 8, 2006 04:35 PM

I think in the list of all-time stupidest basketball player crimes, none can top Olden Polynice of the Utah Jazz, who got arrested--TWICE--for himself pulling people over and impersonating a cop. Gee, who would have imagined that Salt Lake City residents would notice anything unusual about a 7 foot tall black man pulling them over in an unmarked car?

Posted by: Dave J. at June 8, 2006 04:47 PM

Followed by Damon's choice of a low-profile vehicle for Centralia I-5 bong hits -- a yellow Humvee.

Posted by: Jack Bog at June 8, 2006 04:54 PM

I'm gonna have to agree that nothing beats 'Officer' Olden Polynice and his famed arrests on the comedy scale.

I dunno how to fix the Blazers. Paul Allen is horrible, but so are 90% of the GMs in the league. I wish I thought a new owner would prevent us from doing things like signing Zach to a six year EIGHTYFOUR million dollar extension. Ugggggh.

Posted by: Sebastian at June 8, 2006 05:11 PM

The irony of Zach Randolph "drag" racing outside the Embers is not lost on me.

Posted by: Hinckley at June 8, 2006 05:48 PM

That location is approximate. The report I saw said "on SW Broadway, north of Burnside," which of course is impossible.

Posted by: Jack Bog at June 8, 2006 06:20 PM

Jack: I hope you and other PDC/Urban Renewal wardens keep a close track of the potential Blazer sale in relationship to all the nearby properties that Paul Allen and Vulcan control/owns around the Rose Garden. City Council/PDC have a way of giving taxpayer funded "gimmies" all in the so-called public interest game.

Posted by: Lee at June 8, 2006 07:19 PM

The players are a bunch of thugs....they use thug music (rap) to promote their game...this is why I watch hockey.......my 14 year old hockey player son has more talent then some of these jerks.....I hope they just move out of town and leave us alone for once and for all.....

Posted by: thaddeus at June 8, 2006 11:26 PM

Suppose a law student were crossing the road in the late hours just as in Harlem:
"The way cars speed during early hours makes us crazy - there are way too many incidents of this." (Hit and run.)

How about the risk of "negligent hiring;" with waiver by the owner of the privilege of limited liability by the incorporated organization?

Posted by: Ron Ledbury at June 9, 2006 07:35 AM

I'm still trying to figure out if Zach's actions are pure arrogance, pure stupidity or a generous mixing of both. I'm leaning toward the mix with a healthy majority of it being just plain stupidity.

Jack have you checked your email recently??? I sent you an evite.

Posted by: hilsy at June 9, 2006 09:19 AM

I'm still trying to figure out if Zach's actions are pure arrogance, pure stupidity or a generous mixing of both. I'm leaning toward the mix with a healthy majority of it being just plain stupidity.

I'd say there is a healthy foundation of stupidity underlying the whole affair, but there is also the arrogance of being a super-rich athlete who has been receiving preferential treatment for the past 15 years, and who knows that people will pull strings on his behalf. Ask yourself this: if Zach wasn't "Zach Randolph, Trailblazer" but instead some average African American guy from North Portland, and was caught driving his SUV 60 mph down Broadway, who then fled the scene, and who had two loaded handguns under his seat (concealed permits not withstanding), how fast would he have gone to jail?

Posted by: Dave J. at June 9, 2006 09:51 AM

And as usual Zach and Mile shave done a great job of lowering their trade value to next to nil.

Allen vetoing the dump of Miles on the Knicks may be the worst of his many bad moves over the years. After his "performance" the last half of the season even Isaiah is probably smart enough to not give anything.

Randolph might at least attract a team willign to take a flyer.

Maybe if you package Telfair with Randolph and take back a bad contract you can get a decent draft pick. I'd take Roy at 4 (I'll be willign to bet anyone he has a better NBA career thanb Morrison, Gay or any of the other guys projected around #4!) and then a big man project with the other pick you get in trade.

Posted by: Eric at June 9, 2006 10:56 AM



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