What would a government agency be if it didn't blow big bucks on endless "strategic plans," groovy mottoes, new "brands," and constant bureaucratic "re-engineering"? Well, the City of Portland's human resources office isn't going to be outdone in any of those departments: It's hiring a local accounting firm, AKT, on a no-bid basis to do all of that and more, in connection with something called "Re-Engineering of the City's HR Business Process." The estimated price tag: 50 grand.

So far they've come up with a real catchy slogan: "Knowledgeable, Helpful and Responsive." You read it here first, people: That one is bound to go viral.