This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on March 8, 2013 10:50 AM. The previous post in this blog was 8,000,000. The next post in this blog is Another multi-modal thief in Portland. Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.

E-mail, Feeds, 'n' Stuff

Friday, March 8, 2013

It's almost like having a life

Here's a sure-fire way to suck the life out of your Saturday: A four-hour meeting sponsored by the City of Portland about "how to lead an effective meeting."

This training is open to all interested individuals who would like to learn how to effectively create welcoming environments for community members to participate and work together to improve the livability of Portland’s neighborhoods, use conflict management skills for controversial issues and be an effective voice for your community in front of city council.

Among the speakers is a guy from the Association of Oregon Rail and Transit Advocates. Then a "community facilitator" will sound off. Finally, Nurse Amanda herself will get up to pontificate on "Do's and Don'ts for Testifying in Front of City Council."

We already know the biggest "don't": Expect them to listen if you're not telling them what they want to hear.

Comments (10)

So you don't have to waste time, let me offer some helpful tips for the following topic:

"use conflict management skills for controversial issues"

1) Schedule the meeting when most folks can't attend - head'em off at the pass.

2) If for some reason somebody actually gets to talk, interrupt them and say - "Let's put that issue on the PARKING LOT list and we'll get back to that" - of course you will effectively manage the meeting so that time will run out before you get to that nasty parking lot.

3) Should you have to actually address the issue yourself (because God forbid the medial actually informs the public there is more than one side to an issue), make sure you first say that YOU UNDERSTAND their concerns and then change the subject to something tangential. Remember, never address the issue directly as this could show your hand.

There are many, many more techniques but until you master these my little grasshopper, you are just wasting my time holding the pebble in my well-greased palm.

Weird. Sounds like a "free" indoctrination session. Only choir members need attend the sermon.

Don't think of it as free. Think of it as performance pricing.

Since I moved to eastern Oregon five years ago, I have attended some of the first really productive meetings of my life. I think it is because there is more basic respect for individual differences-kind of ironic given that Portland prides itself on honoring diversity.

During the Do's and Don'ts for Testifying at City Council session, attendees will learn to use twinkle fingers to show silent support for City policy.

There is no sign for disagreement.

Amanda Fritz is going to be there ... and there's free lunch. That means only one thing: Mississippi Pizza!

Garage: There's no such thing as a free lunch.

The dirty little secret about "progressive" liberalism is that they're all about diversity... as long as you don't dare disagree with them.

Remember to discuss your TPS reports.

Did you get the memo?

About fifteen years ago, I worked for a time as a contractor for Sprint. By the time I was done, I argued that the company should change its name to something more truthful, like "Crawl Like A Gut-Shot Hyena," mostly due to its meetings policy. Whole days would be wasted on idiotic meetings that existed solely so some starched shirt could pretend to be important. The worst was a managereveryone referred to as "Peanut-Head," who learned that the best way to pretend to be busy was to schedule endless team meetings to discuss and ignore changes in procedures. By the time I left, Peanut-Head was into the habit of (wait for it) scheduling meetings to prepare for meetings. This way, he could justify having nothing to show for his time other than innumerable handmade PowerPoint awards to himself and the most complete "Star Wars" action figure collection that ever graced a managerial cubicle anywhere.

Well, it's good to know that Peanut-Head moved to Portland and is trying to get the whole city to have meetings to prepare for meetings. My recommendation: right between the eyes.

Clicky Web Analytics