Worst. Cocktail. Ever. (Jack Bog's Blog)

Here at Blog Central, Christmastime is our excuse to imbibe some fancy cocktails. The other night we indulged in a Butterfly Kiss (vanilla vodka and Frangelico), and tonight we were ready to try something new for us -- a concoction known as the Last Word. The Mrs.'s cousin left us a wonderful gift yesterday: all the ingredients you would need for this drink, which we're told is the hot item at trendy bars from coast to coast this year. It's equal parts gin, lime juice, green chartreuse, and Luxardo liqueur. Tonight, with most of the shopping done for the holiday, we were ready to give it a go.

We dutifully squeezed and strained the limes, measured out the various shots, and shook it up with ice. When we poured it, we were a little taken aback by the color -- a bit like prune juice:

But hey, they say it's the latest and greatest, and so it was bottoms up!

Gack!

Man, that was bad. Maybe the first, unfavorable impression would subside with the second sip...

Ewwww!

Just as bad, maybe worse. A thought occurred to this: They should serve this at A.A. meetings. You taste this, you will never drink again.

Nowadays, when adversity strikes, we reach for the smart phone, and we immediately did so in this instance. Soon we discovered what was going on. The recipe apparently wants Luxardo's Maraschino liqueur, not its wickedly bitter licorice colleague, Fernet, which is what we had. Thank goodness. We'll try to get it right next time.

Meanwhile, it's back to the Butterfly Kiss. Use that cinnamon stick garnish as a straw. Merry Christmas!

Comments (15)

It started with gin. Even if you had the right liqueur I don't think I'd like it. You should try my favorite drink - which I came up with on my own - I call it the Black Jamaican. It's 1 shot Kahlua and 1/2 coconut rum over ice. Mmmmmm. Merry Christmas!

Posted by Linda Kruschke | December 22, 2012 8:19 PM

Try it on Stency and Reeko...they'll probably drink anything!

Posted by Portland Native | December 22, 2012 9:17 PM

I don't think I have ever poured out a nearly full drink, in more than 40 years of pounding them. But this was special, trust me. I dare anyone to try it.

Posted by Jack Bog | December 22, 2012 9:26 PM

Leblon Cachaca--

This Brazilian National Liquor blew my mind last week. It has a very complex flavor--not quite rum or tequila. Distinct and very smooth. It's aged in old cognac casks from France.

Try it neat or in a Caipirhina.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E6P1Q-UycHA&feature=player_embedded

http://lebloncachaca.com/the-caipirinha/

I am hoping to find Leblon Cachaca at the Goose Hollow Liquor Store. (Hope the urls worked here.)

Merry Christmas e Boa Noite!

Posted by Skeezus | December 22, 2012 9:59 PM

That sounds really good skeez. I've always been a big rum fan, spiced or otherwise. I'll try it.

My favorite cocktail is simple. Vanilla rum and cherry soda from a fountain or bottle. NOT cherry coke out of plastic or a can. Trust me. It matters.

Posted by Jo | December 22, 2012 10:09 PM

There's nothing to compare with a Caipirinha on a hot day in, say, Ipanema.

Posted by Allan L. | December 22, 2012 10:28 PM

"The girl from Ipanema"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gm5G4SQJnmM&playnext=1&list=PL0036E094411ECAD9

Posted by clinamen | December 22, 2012 11:07 PM

This time with Stan Getz!

"The Girl from Ipanema" Astrud Gilberto, João Gilberto and Stan Getz

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5QfXjsoNe4

Posted by clinamen | December 22, 2012 11:28 PM

No Jack. You did not pour the worst drink ever. I did. For my best friend. College dazes. Had a bottle of cheap whiskey. Only had unsweetened kool-aid for a mixer. Made Gary a drink. He tasted it. Said "Here, taste this". I did. Was horrible. I had used salt instead of sugar in the kool-aid (a simple goof, when you know what is legal in Washington now). He never let me mix him a drink again.

Posted by B.P. Red | December 22, 2012 11:49 PM

B.P. You win. That's just nasty.

Posted by Jo | December 23, 2012 2:56 AM

Gotta draw the line whenever the ingredients include Fernet or Absinthe.

Posted by Steve | December 23, 2012 8:04 AM

If you are curious if your liquor store has something you can check here first:

http://www.oregonliquorsearch.com/

I do not work for OLCC I just like to know who has something before I go store to store. The Luxardo Maraschino can be a difficult find.

Posted by tboo | December 23, 2012 10:57 AM

Got it--Leblon Cachaca at SE 11th Ave Liquor Store $23-- I grabbed a couple of fat AB Prensado's too, for the salad course.

Nice link tboo!

Posted by Skeez | December 23, 2012 1:54 PM

Give the Last Word another try after you get some maraschino. It's delicious. And if you haven't tried the Aviator yet (w/ creme de violette), I recommend that as well. I learned about both drinks from the book Boozehound, the author's name escapes me...

Posted by Neil | December 23, 2012 2:58 PM

I created a drink once that I called "Kick in the Crotch." It was neon green and had a bit of everything in it.

Tasted great, but resulted in the only post-drinking vomit I've ever had, so I consider the experiment a failure overall.

Posted by TacoDave | December 24, 2012 11:10 AM

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