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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on November 24, 2012 11:33 PM. The previous post in this blog was Vice Principal Big Brother. The next post in this blog is He taught me how to watch, fight, and pray. Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.

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Saturday, November 24, 2012

Put away the swimsuits and sunscreen

The Willamette River, which is supposedly so clean that it's time to start swimming in it, has been getting quite the flow of raw sewage this week. But don't worry, in a few months all that contamination will be gone -- it just disappears -- so let's build a recreational beach downtown for all the kids to bike down to. Better yet, go by streetcar!

Comments (12)

I guess the "Big Pipe" should have been a little "Bigger."

Size isn't everything.

Would anyone like to replace the back up water do to the Sandy river.Please change back to a 1950 flow

I thought we were paying sky-high, jacked up water/sewer rates to pay for building the "big pipe" (against EPA recommendations) so that this wouldn't happen anymore, and I thought the big pipe was done, so why is this still happening?

Will any local paper dare to ask the question?

Obviously, some of the Big Pipe money had to be diverted to Water Houses, neon roses, and bioswales.

"I'd do it all again, you ungrateful peons," Randy Leonard was quoted as saying. "Now away from the river for four days if you know what's good for you!"

No worries, this is all part of the latest trend, the SEW AGE movement...

Can't wait for the Bureau of Life Guard and Beach Safety, not to mention the disability claims from the new river security employees

Do they even need swimsuits? The downtown beach (let's call it "Irony Cove") will be clothing optional. You must appear before a panel of judges and acquire a $10 daily hotness permit to enter. Nobody un-hip or over 35 need apply.

Irony Cove will quickly become subdivided to provide a safe, affirming environment for every pressure group and self-identified constituency in the City. There will be room for one bather per zone. You can appeal to abolish other zones for insufficient trendiness.

If a constituency zone is empty, then the next person in line will be made an honorary member of that pressure group, and may temporarily use the zone. You can be unceremoniously displaced by a genuine, card-carrying member of this group.

Each attendee will be assessed a retroactive property tax as they exit Irony Cove, with credit given for remaining hours on the hotness permit. The fee structure is very complex, so free tax services will be made available for the underprivileged.

No fatty snacks, no sugary soda, no alcohol, no music, no swimming (it disturbs the chum fish), no sports or gams, certainly no parking, and absolutely no fun allowed.

Ha... yes gams, no games. Portland honors the naturalness of the human body, unless it is old, flabby, pale, or insufficiently covered with waves of censor-approved body modification. Try to be more cool next time.

By widening the sewer pipes, they encouraged people to go to the bathroom more.

They also encouraged or lured more people into an area while making the entire area more dense.
What kind of overflow will we have with the million more they tell us are coming that we have to make room for? Seems to me to be a losing game as far as cleaning up our river.

http://www.thebigfloat.com/
Come on in – the water’s fine!
Despite public perception (which we are trying to change), the Willamette River is approved for swimming, except in the now rare instances when Combined Sewer Overflow (CSO) conditions are present. With the Big Pipe project now complete, it’s expected that a CSO will occur only once every two summers. You are more likely to see a whale swim up the Willamette than see a CSO in summer! Oregon DEQ states that when CSO conditions are not present, “the Willamette River is safe for swimming and other recreational uses.”

http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2012/11/portland_warns_residents_to_av.html

Portland's combined sewer system carries both sewage and storm water. Heavy rainstorms overload the system and cause it to spill into the Willamette River about four times every winter. The water is contaminated with bacteria from untreated sewage.

Big float link information is that in the summer CSO will occur only once every two summers.
On the oregonlive link the information is the spill is about four times every winter.

I hope people remember this if in the future any plans are made that we should drink this!


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