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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on November 25, 2012 8:44 AM. The previous post in this blog was He taught me how to watch, fight, and pray. The next post in this blog is Take an Alka Seltzer -- here comes another helping. Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.

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« He taught me how to watch, fight, and pray | Main | Take an Alka Seltzer -- here comes another helping »

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Caption this photo

So far the best we've got is, "He filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk."

Posted at 8:44 AM | Permalink

Comments (32)

In a flashback of his own mentoring, Sam wistfully realizes how little time is left to give away Portland's remaining assets.

Posted by panchopdx | November 25, 2012 9:09 AM

"A lump of coal? I've got a full streetcar full of coal for this clown!"

Posted by Al in SE | November 25, 2012 9:12 AM

Where are all the good little boys?

Posted by ltjd | November 25, 2012 9:19 AM

"Wait until this clown finds out there is no Santa"

Posted by phil | November 25, 2012 9:19 AM

"...in closing I must say I am very disappointed at being required to deliver Portland’s presents by streetcar and believe the new reindeer tax is a bit unfair. Last but not least, Mrs. Claus and I don’t understand why the North Pole is being asked to help pay for the Sellwood Bridge project."

Posted by gibby | November 25, 2012 9:20 AM

Don't you mean "He filled all the stockings, then turned to a jerk."

Posted by LexusLibertarian | November 25, 2012 9:21 AM

So in conclusion, because the reindeer were emitting too much methane and contributing to global warming, from now on we will only be delivering toys by bicycle. Although Tom Miller has timed all the traffic lights for us, we will still only be able to reach about 112 kids this year. Sorry, the rest are out of luck.

Posted by m | November 25, 2012 9:31 AM

This repulsive creep says his plan for a new partnership, Santa Committee and new tax on all deliveries will result in a better Christmas for families throughout Portland.

How the heck did you ever get such an idiot for Mayor?

Posted by IandH | November 25, 2012 9:33 AM

I'd like to bump into him in the city hall men's room......

Posted by Pom Mom of LO | November 25, 2012 9:41 AM

Sam: "Gee, I wonder if anyone else sees that it's Neil Goldschmidt."

Posted by Bill McDonald | November 25, 2012 10:11 AM

Damn, now I know what my next career move it going to be!

I'm just about there on size, can lie my ass off, and no one will make a fuss if a little one is sitting on my lap.

Posted by tim | November 25, 2012 10:39 AM

"And here to present you with this year's naughty list, Mayor Adams."

Posted by JO | November 25, 2012 11:16 AM

Santa Clause speaks at a press conference where Portland Mayor Sam Adams unveiled his plan to address a city revenue shortfall by collecting a fee on rooftop reindeer parking.

Posted by reader | November 25, 2012 11:54 AM

"On Comet! On Cupid! On Donner and Blitzen!" And that was before Beau!

Posted by PDXLifer | November 25, 2012 12:28 PM

"And the brown envelope goes to...."

Posted by Mojo | November 25, 2012 1:00 PM

Santa: "I am here today to announce Sam Adams has been selected to lead our sustainability efforts on the Island of BrokenToys.
Wood chipping and composting will begin immediately.
Do not put reindeer s**t in the green bins.
Pick up will be only on a monthly basis.
All plastics must be put in the blue bins....

Posted by Portland Native | November 25, 2012 1:10 PM

I'm feeling a little jolly under my slacks right now. I wonder if his elves are near by?

Posted by SamTheClam | November 25, 2012 1:40 PM

Rest assured the Better Bag Ban will not affect my sustainable toy bag....

Posted by L.O. Resident | November 25, 2012 1:41 PM

"I am here to announce that Mayoy Creepy has been naughty."

Posted by x-portlander | November 25, 2012 2:02 PM

"I shall resign as Santa effective at noon tomorrow. Vice Santa Adams will be sworn in as Santa at that hour in this office."

Posted by Nate Conrad | November 25, 2012 2:10 PM

(thought bubble above Sam): "I think I met him at the 2007 International Bear Rendevous. But he was wearing all leather, so it's hard to tell."

Posted by Mister Tee | November 25, 2012 2:27 PM

Sam: Wanna' jingle my bells?

Posted by JFree | November 25, 2012 2:42 PM

Oops, that's "Claus".

Posted by reader | November 25, 2012 2:43 PM

Just a moment, I have to go back and get the whip out of the sleigh.

Posted by Nolo | November 25, 2012 2:47 PM

"See these Christmas balls I have in my left hand?? They used to be the Mayor's. See how he is covering up?? Yes, it is true, as they say,---your Mayor has no balls."

Posted by Charlie | November 25, 2012 3:01 PM

Sam is so excited about trains, he's ready to pull one.

Posted by Downtown Denizen | November 25, 2012 3:02 PM

Sam's smiling cause he's looking forward to sitting in Santa's lap as soon as the presser is over.....

Posted by thaddeus | November 25, 2012 4:34 PM

Hey, Bud, is that the best job I can expect after mayorship?

Posted by Rick Newton | November 25, 2012 4:53 PM

Santa did his best to fill everybody’s Christmas wishes and then turned to Sammyboy and said: "Along with the wishes of others, here are your walking papers. My job is very difficult as is, so quit dictating how people – including myself - should travel, and stop trying to plug up all the chimneys in Portland you jerk!”

Posted by TR | November 25, 2012 6:02 PM

Sam:
I know he knows who's naughty and nice, but does he have to hold a d#@*! press conference just about me?

Posted by Lc Scott | November 25, 2012 6:36 PM

"Sorry I'm late -- the closest parking spot was in Beaverton."

Posted by Isaac Laquedem | November 25, 2012 6:42 PM

"When a Celebrated Activist Turns Out To Be an FBI Informant, the Sagittarian
Satyr Cause© is hereby canceled because Pope disputes the date of Jesus' birth.
Sorry folks, no shopping until further notice"

Posted by Tenskwatawa | November 26, 2012 8:03 PM

In Vino Veritas

Charamba, Douro 2008
Horse Heaven Hills, Cabernet 2010
Lorelle, Horse Heaven Hills Pinot Grigio 2011
Avignonesi, Montepulciano 2004
Lorelle, Willamette Valley Pinot Noir 2011
Villa Antinori, Toscana 2007
Mercedes Eguren, Cabernet Sauvignon 2009
Lorelle, Columbia Valley Cabernet 2011
Purple Moon, Merlot 2011
Purple Moon, Chardonnnay 2011
Abacela, Vintner's Blend No. 12
Opula Red Blend 2010
Liberte, Pinot Noir 2010
Chateau Ste. Michelle, Indian Wells Red Blend 2010
Woodbridge, Chardonnay 2011
King Estate, Pinot Noir 2011
Famille Perrin, Cotes du Rhone Villages 2010
Columbia Crest, Les Chevaux Red 2010
14 Hands, Hot to Trot White Blend
Familia Bianchi, Malbec 2009
Terrapin Cellars, Pinot Gris 2011
Columbia Crest, Walter Clore Private Reserve 2009
Campo Viejo, Rioja, Termpranillo 2010
Ravenswood, Cabernet Sauvignon 2009
Quinta das Amoras, Vinho Tinto 2010
Waterbrook, Reserve Merlot 2009
Lorelle, Horse Heaven Hills, Pinot Grigio 2011
Tarantas, Rose
Chateau Lajarre, Bordeaux 2009
La Vielle Ferme, Rose 2011
Benvolio, Pinot Grigio 2011
Nobilo Icon, Pinot Noir 2009
Lello, Douro Tinto 2009
Quinson Fils, Cotes de Provence Rose 2011
Anindor, Pinot Gris 2010
Buenas Ondas, Syrah Rose 2010
Les Fiefs d'Anglars, Malbec 2009
14 Hands, Pinot Gris 2011
Conundrum 2012
Condes de Albarei, Albariño 2011
Columbia Crest, Walter Clore Private Reserve 2007
Penelope Sanchez, Garnacha Syrah 2010
Canoe Ridge, Merlot 2007
Atalaya do Mar, Godello 2010
Vega Montan, Mencia
Benvolio, Pinot Grigio
Nobilo Icon, Pinot Noir, Marlborough 2009
Portuga, Rose 2011
Revelation, Chardonnay, Pays d'Oc 2010
Beaulieu, Cabernet, Rutherford 2005
Monte Alto, Tinto Reserva 2005
Chateau Ste. Michelle, Cabernet, Indian Wells 2009
Espiral, Vinho Rose
Vin-Koru, Pinot Gris 2011
14 Hands, Hot to Trot Red 2009
Rodney Strong, Cabernet, Sonoma 2009
Abacela, Vintner's Blend #11
Portuga, White 2010
La Bourgeoisie, Red 2009
Januik, Red 2009
Three Rivers, River's Red 2008
Kirkland, Alexander Valley Merlot 2008
Muga, Rioja Rose 2010
Quinta das Amoras, Vinho Tinto 2009
Mauro Molino, Barbera d'Alba 2009
Garda Chiaretto Rose
Columbia Crest, Two Vines Vineyard 10 White
Chateau Ste. Michelle, Pinot Gris, Columbia Valley 2009
L'Hortus, Rose de Saignee 2010
Maculan, Pino & Toi 2008
McKinley Springs, Bombing Range Red 2008
Trader Joe's Pinot Gris 2009
Montes Alpha, Cabernet 2007
Gran Sasso, Sangiovese, Terre di Chieti 2009
Garda, Classico Chiaretto Rose
Beaulieu, Cabernet, Rutherford 1999
Picos del Montgo, Tempranillo 2008
Chateau de Montmirail, Vacqueyras 2008
La Granja 360, Syrah 2009
Montgras, Carmenere Reserva 2009
Lange, Pinot Gris 2009
Columbia Crest, Horse Heaven Hills Cabernet 2008
Kirkland, Pinot Grigio 2010
Trader Joe's Coastal Syrah 2009
Columbia Crest, Horse Heaven Hills Merlot 2008
Trader Joe's Coastal Chardonnay 2009
Vieux Papes Red
Domaine de l'Aujardiere, Chardonnay 2009
Santa Rita, Cabernet, Medalla Real 2007
Penfold's, Koonunga Hill Shiraz Cabernet 2008
Guild, Red, Lot #02 2008
Dievole, Dievolino Sangiovese 2008
Laforet, Burgogne Chardonnay 2009
Columbia Winery, Merlot 2007
Bonterra, Cabernet 2008
Elk Cove, Pinot Gris 2009
Maquis Lien 2006
Scott Paul, Pinot Noir, Le Paulee 2007

The Occasional Book

Hope Larson - A Wrinkle in Time, the Graphic Novel
Rudyard Kipling - Kim
Peter Ames Carlin - Bruce
Fran Cannon Slayton - When the Whistle Blows
Neil Young - Waging Heavy Peace
Mark Bego - Aretha Franklin, the Queen of Soul (2012 ed.)
Jenny Lawson - Let's Pretend This Never Happened
J.D. Salinger - Franny and Zooey
Charles Dickens - A Christmas Carol
Timothy Egan - The Big Burn
Deborah Eisenberg - Transactions in a Foreign Currency
Kurt Vonnegut Jr. - Slaughterhouse Five
Kathryn Lance - Pandora's Genes
Cheryl Strayed - Wild
Fyodor Dostoyevsky - The Brothers Karamazov
Jack London - The House of Pride, and Other Tales of Hawaii
Jack Walker - The Extraordinary Rendition of Vincent Dellamaria
Colum McCann - Let the Great World Spin
Niccolò Machiavelli - The Prince
Harper Lee - To Kill a Mockingbird
Emma McLaughlin & Nicola Kraus - The Nanny Diaries
Brian Selznick - The Invention of Hugo Cabret
Sharon Creech - Walk Two Moons
Keith Richards - Life
F. Sionil Jose - Dusk
Natalie Babbitt - Tuck Everlasting
Justin Halpern - S#*t My Dad Says
Mark Herrmann - The Curmudgeon's Guide to Practicing Law
Barry Glassner - The Gospel of Food
Phil Stanford - The Peyton-Allan Files
Jesse Katz - The Opposite Field
Evelyn Waugh - Brideshead Revisited
J.K. Rowling - Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
David Sedaris - Holidays on Ice
Donald Miller - A Million Miles in a Thousand Years
Mitch Albom - Have a Little Faith
C.S. Lewis - The Magician's Nephew
F. Scott Fitzgerald - The Great Gatsby
William Shakespeare - A Midsummer Night's Dream
Ivan Doig - Bucking the Sun
Penda Diakité - I Lost My Tooth in Africa
Grace Lin - The Year of the Rat
Oscar Hijuelos - Mr. Ives' Christmas
Madeline L'Engle - A Wrinkle in Time
Steven Hart - The Last Three Miles
David Sedaris - Me Talk Pretty One Day
Karen Armstrong - The Spiral Staircase
Charles Larson - The Portland Murders
Adrian Wojnarowski - The Miracle of St. Anthony
William H. Colby - Long Goodbye
Steven D. Stark - Meet the Beatles
Phil Stanford - Portland Confidential
Rick Moody - Garden State
Jonathan Schwartz - All in Good Time
David Sedaris - Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim
Anthony Holden - Big Deal
Robert J. Spitzer - The Spirit of Leadership
James McManus - Positively Fifth Street
Jeff Noon - Vurt

Road Work

Miles run year to date: 32
At this date last year: 66
Total run in 2012: 129
In 2011: 113
In 2010: 125
In 2009: 67
In 2008: 28
In 2007: 113
In 2006: 100
In 2005: 149
In 2004: 204
In 2003: 269