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Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Oxymoron o' the Day

Healthy convenience store.

Comments (10)

But Jack, the O credulously reports that locally sourced goods are inherently (and, presumably, supernaturally) "healthier:"

" . . . plans to launch her own chain of small stores that will stock healthier options, such as locally cured salami instead of Slurpees and gourmet cheese instead of the liquid variety. "

Won't see many Oregon Trail Cards there.

There are a required two items to be profitable with a convenience store, cigarettes and beer. Without those forget about it.

Cloves and artisan microbrews work?

Is there free city money, i.e, taxpayer money, involved, say as a start-up? Otherwise, it doesn't make a lot of business sense.

Ah, cured salami is a healthy choice? Sure, nitrates and fat is good if you claim it's local.

"Without those forget about it."

Don't forget about the lottery. Six video screens cure all other problems.

Is there free city money, i.e, taxpayer money, involved, say as a start-up?

Mayor Creepy's "innovation fund," or whatever the heck it's called, is no doubt standing by with our property taxes, ready to help a struggling young creative get a start.

Will these so-called "convenience stores" have only full-time workers, who receive $15/hour or greater with fully paid healthcare and other benefits, and will there be a minority hiring requirement involved?

Jack, don't forget that CoP has more taxpayer money than the "innovation fund" for start-up convenience stores. There's the Equity Bureau that has dollars to help the food desert inequities. And there's the Portland Plan that has other divisions of Bureaus to help a start-up such as this. Sam can pull $dollars out from about anywhere.

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