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Monday, June 4, 2012

Portland City Hall encourages food slop snitches

The Sam Rand Twins are such great guys. They've added squealing on your neighbor to the many other "green" practices that make Portlandia so livable.

Comments (34)

Stenchy says "Snitches get stitches". Perhaps we can have "Waste Enforcement Patrols" and "re-education camps" to stop violators - keep Portland totalitarian!

Sounds like a great way to build community. I guess that's why Portland has porches in their building codes - better to spy on your neighbors from!

Anyone else think that some anony"mouse" calls on the city council members, Mayor, etc. would call attention to just how stupid and petty this solution is?

Seriously thinking about moving away from my boyhood home over this and the rest of the junk they've pulled. Wife has a job in Vancouver, I'm close to being able to work from home full time. I really dislike Vantucky, but it is making more and more sense everyday.

Which city counselors voted for this garbage?

And my inevitable move to Corbett begins to take shape.

I think we need to encourage a few whistle blowers to snitch on our city council!

When Recology has said that food waste is prohibited in yard debris!! - how is it that our council thinks they know better???!!??
Is this a another political decision, not based on science?

Recology Oregon Material Recovery (ROMR) - West Linn Dan Davis Recycling Facility is operated by Recology for the City of West Linn. We accept yard debris and wood waste and metal.

We also sell compost, organic humus, dark hemlock and medium bark dust.
Accepted Items
Items We Accept
Yard debris, sod, bushes and shrubs
(branches and wood must be separated)
Wood, branches, and stumps (under 2')
PROHIBITED MATERIALS: Wet Garbage, Food Waste, Chemicals, Commercial Refrigerants, Railroad Ties, Paint, Auto Parts/Motors, Tires Over 22.5 Inches, Hazardous Waste Including Asbestos Containing Materials

I think this is a great idea. We could deputize one or two residents on every block to be agents in a hush hush enforcement group. Let's call it the Kitchen Garbage Brigade.

It would be the role of members of this "KGB" to keep an eye on neighbors and make sure everyone is living according to the precepts of The Plan. So that everyone is on the same page, we should probably require that loyal citizens carry around a copy of The Plan in a little red book.

So, how much will the reward be for snitching on the neighbors?

Roger, I'm assuming the act of snitching will be a reward all its own. What better way to enhance one's sense of community?

You know, I actually see a possible business opportunity. Like ride-share, let's do a web site for garbage-share! Everyone's garbage is picked up at different weeks and days. Have them register, for an off week partner. Then, take the others garbage on your week, and they take yours on their week.

The best thing is, it sticks it to the man! (Very popular in this City.)

Didn't Vera have a plan years ago to have a block captain?
What is next?
- all have to have lights out by 10pm to conserve electricity?
- can't be seen driving a car in certain areas or ticketed?
- one who snitches the most will be crowned King or Queen of Snitches and get to have lunch with the SamRand twins?

When I worked for Texas Instruments in the early Nineties, we had a CEO who was just the same sort of control freak about damn near everything. First it was random drug tests, until upper management kept amazingly testing positive. (From what I understood, some of the tests were bad enough that Hunter S. Thompson would have looked at the numbers and exclaimed "DAMN.") Then his big kick was on smoking: anybody who touched tobacco was automatically considered a smoker, and had to pay a $10 per week fee, ostensibly to cover insurance costs. However, a smoker who quit had to wait six months before s/he didn't have the charge removed. Considering how little we were paid (the joke was that "TI" stood for either "Tiny Income" or "Totally Incompetent"), that $20 per paycheck usually dictated whether or not any of us had any discretionary income at the end of the month.

Now, I wasn't a smoker, but I sympathized with the smokers on the "all stick, no carrot" approach from the CEO. In particular, what infuriated me and damn near all of the non-smokers in my department was how this was going to be enforced. Namely, TI already had a reputation for encouraging tattle-tales, and Mr. Junkins's plan depended upon everyone ratting on everyone else. See a buddy get a cigar when a co-worker had a new baby, even if the buddy never smoked it? If your buddy didn't turn himself in and sign up as a smoker, he was up for disciplinary action if anybody reported to a supervisor that he'd accepted it. Worse, the whole system was rife for abuse: one of the trusties in my department, er, I mean, group leaders was a guy who went golfing with the cost center manager solely so he could get away with terrorizing everyone else in the department. We're talking about drawing swastikas on lockers and faking chemical spills. If he tattled on someone he didn't like, even video footage to the contrary couldn't save them, but questioning him got blowoffs from the manager over "Well, I've known him for a long time, and he'd never do anything like that."

Then as now, push people hard enough, and they'll fight back. At TI, we had the Mad S***ter, our very own superhero who crapped on managerial desks. I'm fully expecting a whole Justice League of people filling Sam and Randy's bins with their own garbage, and then turning in the two for violating their own city regulations. Either that, or pelting Sam in public with used diapers and other items that Sam feels can stand to be in composting containers for two weeks at a time.

Do we get, like, little red vests to wear? And a little red book?

Max, we all get "Ace Composters" merit badges.

What? You mean even more work now for the neighborhood association stooges?? Don't they have enough to do already with filing city reports of cracked sidewalks, and reporting tree cutting on private property, and preventing viable businesses from developing vacant business lots, and so on and so forth??

Is it safe to call our city council a bunch of communists now ?
Or should we wait until they build a camps for offenders reeducation

It's unfortunate but this is a necessary measure to prevent slop scofflaws from hindering the success of the program.

It's a minor annoyance compared to the aggravation caused by those having less consideration for the commons.

If these malcontents would simply acclimate to our new community standards these additional neighbor enforcement measures would not be necessary.

Conform or be subjected to community conformity measures.

It's that simple.

Maybe our soon to be socialist ex-mayor is looking for a new job: official garbage snoop. Then when he is rummaging in other people’s bins for returnable cans and bottles to load up his shopping cart, he can claim it is sanctioned.

Do we get, like, little red vests to wear? And a little red book?

A red neckerchief will do, or how about a green one printed with the emblem of the Autonomous Oblast of Portland?

This is also another way for CoP to raise revenue... by collecting from people who are "bad" and by constantly adding to the list of "offenses".

I suppose some prize will be need to be periodically awarded to people who are "good" just to keep up community spirit, whatever is left of it.

What a wonderful way to get back at someone you don't like for any reason at all!

Being "green" in Portland is the new McCarthyism!

Wow. I'm a retired LEO and the notion of this sort of thing scares *me*. What sort of due process with be offered before the Green Schutzstaffel shows up on your doorstep?

Anonymous reporting? As noted in the comments of the O's article, I guess you can forget about the 6th Amendmant.

How long do you think it will take before people involved in neighborhood disputes start dumping contraband garbage in each other's bins, just so they can make a bogus complaint?

How with they establish the true identity of the person who actually placed the garbage - surveillance, fingerprints, DNA?

In an administration known for it's bad ideas, this has got to be one of the worst.

Here's another revenue angle...

The resulting fiasco will require everyone to get locking trash and compost containers. This in turn opens up another rate raising scam...

Ha ha ha ....

The City That Works

Those who complain will be sent to Attitude Adjustment Camp.

I'll take the red neckerchief for $200, Alex (can we still use that word? I mean, "neckerchief" has the banned "chief" word in it; don't want to upset the Indians. Oh, right...two of our Tribes are ticked off about the nonsense, but they don't count, so - Ban In!).

What's particularly amusing is that my in-laws in Beaverton still get weekly garbage pickup, no slop buckets involved - and their garbage goes to the same transfer stations that Portland's goes into. The difference, I think, is that Portland City Hall is all about ego, results be damned.

Hey, everybody! Look at me! I'm so green and sustainable!

Pretty putrid "group-think" off-gassing in city hall offices again.

You know... this could be a useful program for that snarky neighbor that no one likes... at night, fill their pail with illegal garbage contraband, then turn them in. It would be great fun. Oh, damn, is that a EPA Drone flying over my house here in Nebraska!!?? Gotta go.

Got a neighbor who annoys you?
Drop a diaper on him.

"What's particularly amusing is that my in-laws in Beaverton still get weekly garbage pickup, no slop buckets involved - and their garbage goes to the same transfer stations that Portland's goes into. The difference, I think, is that Portland City Hall is all about ego, results be damned."

I live in Portland, but one of my friends, who lives a few blocks away from me, is in Milwaukie. We have the same garbage service provider, the same pickup days, even the same trucks. But she still gets weekly garbage pickup. The number of trucks on the road has actually been increased all in the name of being green. Tattling on one's neighbors just adds another layer of absurdity to this whole program. It's fascinating to watch.

As a lucky resident of "quirky" inner SE Portland, I'm well acquainted with passers by choosing to put all manner of weirdness into my various refuse containers when I set them out the night before. Plastic bottles get thrown into my trash, dog poop gets thrown into my recycling, etc. How will the city know who was ultimately responsible for the placement of something in a container that was set out (per Waste Management/Metro's suggestion) the night before, and that was unmonitored for 8-10 hours?

And here's the REALLY good news. The two losers that you've got running for mayor, you know, stupid and ignorant, both of them LOVE this stuff. Make sure to vote early and vote often, you can't make this stuff up.

How will the city know who was ultimately responsible for the placement of something in a container that was set out (per Waste Management/Metro's suggestion) the night before, and that was unmonitored for 8-10 hours?

They won't. The whole thing is a joke.

The funniest part of this story is since the 9:51 am story posted, 6 PAGES of moral outrage hit the oregonlive comment section leading to the 6:15 pm Back pedaling version.

The blow back on the original story must have led to more than a few city hall "... be here NOW" meetings. By 6:15 pm, Beth Slovic posted the revised version. THIS revision makes the feeble attempt to assure readers that this INFORMANT FRIENDLY rule is only meant for people to inform on BUSINESSES ONLY.

So I guess that makes the whole idea of garbage narcs long as it's a business that gets the brunt of the enforcement.

The 6:15pm revised story & comments here:

And yes, those are my comments suggesting the Portland Bureau of Planning and Sustainability needs to have someone rummage thru THEIR garbage.


I worked at BPS - they were definitely not the gold standard for good recycling/composting/garbage sorting. Was probably all those planners who couldn't follow directions.


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