I bet that the river would say "Vote Scott Hernandez for Mayor."

Or, anyway:

Yes, The River Knows
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i27t5txCrwg

"Scott Fernandez for Mayor."

If the river could talk, it would probably say:

I once was a river pristine
'till Portlanders came on the scene
they killed off fish species
with garbage and feces
and now you don't dare fish midstream.

“What do me and water bureau commissioner have in common? We are both full of %#@$.”

http://www.portlandonline.com/bes/index.cfm?a=231478&c=30938

Buried Streams and Lakes

Open streams once flowed across downtown Portland and the NW industrial area. Tanner Creek once flowed into a low, swampy area called Couch Lake, which once extended from just south of the Steel

Tanner Creek sewer construction about 1916
Bridge to the Fremont Bridge but was filled between 1896 and 1919.

Most of the streams were diverted into the sewer system and their streambeds filled to make room for development in the late 1800s. An old cut-off meander of the Willamette River called Guilds Lake, an important feature of the 1905 Lewis and Clark Exposition, was filled for industrial expansion. Marquam Gulch and an unnamed lake were located near the west end of the Marquam Bridge, but are now buried under I-5.

At least the City of Portland is being honest in that downtown and N.W. Portland is an environmental disaster of filled in wildlife habitat and natural drainage. But of course it's OK, because it's in Portland. When another town like Vancouver does it, it's urban sprawl and all sorts of bad things.

Fort Vancouver was set there because it was the most desirable location for a settlement - Lewis & Clark, nor the Hudson's Bay Company, nor the U.S. Army, saw any value in what is now Portland. Downtown, Rivergate, even the Airport - is all fill. Swan Island is fill. We dredged up Ross Island so we'd have fill. The Airport's foundation is actually designed to float in a flood; a massive dike protects the low-lying airport grounds. If a massive earthquake destroys the Columbia River dams sending billions of gallons of water - Portland will be devastated. Vancouver will largely be high and dry. As will Gresham and most of Washington County built about 200 feet above sea level. And the suburbs will get the last laugh while Portland's streetcar system will become nothing more than a derelict submarine transport system april fool's joke.

You owe me a keyboard, Jack. What a great line!

It would say pull this layer of slime off of me that you created. Why would you think that soaking wood poles in non-organic metals that cause cancer would be a good idea for me to be pooped on.

Why do you have such a pretty elegant urban forest that you brag about cutting down [Stumptown] but literally keep shitting on me collectively as a city. Especially when God cries [rain] He hasn't been crying as much lately, but you never wanted to fight that anyway [Big Pipe].

Why do you keep making all the poor Laotian/Cambodian/Russian/Moldavian immigrants keep fishing from right next to where you keep pooping on me?

Can't we just get along, I have gotten better, remember when McCall dumped the demonstration trout fingerlings into me and they all pretty much died within seconds? Thanks for public beaches and recyclable cans, those f'ers just had more territory to destroy other than me, come on 96'!

Scott Fernandez for Mayor and Ole Ersson for chief conservation officer. Keep the nitrogen and phosphorus on the land, thank you very much.

"oregon experts"????? WTF?
and all of the above comments!