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Sunday, November 21, 2010

Consumer Health Tip of the Week

If someone in a bar offers you an on-the-spot breast exam, they may not be a real doctor.

Comments (7)

Titillating, to say the least.

Thanks Jack for keeping us abreast of the latest news....I hope the doctors office doesnt go tits-up as a result...

Let's be fair to the victims: The woman playing doctor in Boise was a really smooth, persuasive talker. I hear she's the same person who sold them the blue football field.

As a comedy writer, I have to deal with stories like this everyday, and have become somewhat of a wacky news expert. This story is definitely worthy - partly as a commentary on life in Idaho - but nothing will ever top the Portugal breast exam story of a few years back:

"Voyeur gets women to bare breasts for satellite
(Filed: 28/06/2002)
Four women have contacted police after being persuaded to stand topless in their windows or balconies so that a satellite could give them a mammogram. The women, aged between 19 and 45, living in the Algarve, southern Portugal, were all contacted by telephone by a woman claiming to be a doctor.
She told them that a revolutionary method had been developed of conducting breast examinations by satellite. They were told that the consultation would be free if they followed instructions by stripping to the waist and standing in view of the satellite. One woman was so trusting that she took off all her clothes for the "examination". Later, the women were telephoned with the alleged results of the examinations. The woman claiming to be a doctor then told them of her sexual desires in graphic detail."

I'm sorry, but that story is untouchable and belongs in the Wacky News Hall of Fame. Apparently the breasts in Idaho weren't quite as untouchable, but the Portugal story still wins out for creativity alone.

The rest of the story: http://www.nwcn.com/news/idaho/Woman-accused-of-giving-fake-breast-exams-is-actually-a-man-109035129.html

Kristina Ross is transgendered, an "M-T-F" or "male to female."

Sometime in the late 1970's some guy in the Eugene area was persuading women over the phone to stand naked in their front windows and pour pitchers of milk over themselves. I think the ruse had something to do with the caller being a police officer that was trying to catch a "peeping Tom" and needing the women to act as bait.

Stories like this and those mentioned in the subsequent comments make me think the human race is doomed.....

John, you ain't seen NOTHING.

The press reports the following, and although I paray it is NOT true, I fear that it is...

"Women in Saudi Arabia should give their breast milk to male colleagues and acquaintances in order to avoid breaking strict Islamic law forbidding mixing between the sexes, two powerful Saudi clerics have said. They are at odds, however, over precisely how the milk should be conveyed.

A fatwa issued recently about adult breast-feeding to establish "maternal relations" and preclude the possibility of sexual contact has resulted in a week's worth of newspaper headlines in Saudi Arabia. Some have found the debate so bizarre that they're calling for stricter regulations about how and when fatwas should be issued.

Sheikh Al Obeikan, an adviser to the royal court and consultant to the Ministry of Justice, set off a firestorm of controversy recently when he said on TV that women who come into regular contact with men who aren't related to them ought to give them their breast milk so they will be considered relatives.

One cleric claims simply pumping and having the men drink the milk is enough to create this familial bond. Another, however, does say that "men should suckle the breast milk directly from a woman's breast."

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