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Friday, July 9, 2010

Today's free ad on the City of Portland website

There's no sign of any public or charitable connection with this come-on. Your tax dollars at work.

Comments (17)


yeah, but on the menu page, the linked website says: "Mean Rules: Sorry, no dogs nor children under 16. No smoking in the dining area. No suing."

So I guess there's nothing you can do about it.

(but seriously what the fsck is that all about? If you're looking for someone to pin the blame on, I bet you can start with Laura Ohm, because of this: http://www.portlandonline.com/bps/index.cfm?c=50648&)

This kind of crap is why the volunteers have to pay for and inoculate the Elm trees!
It is also why you can't get a city inspector to a job site in less than 3 days now.
I guess we have traded the inspectors for cheese makers!

What's the problem? I can plan to go from my early Polo match to my afternoon sail on my America's Cup trimaran, with enough time to have a great dinner. Thanks for the "heads up" Laura, and City of Portland. It's the Portland way!....to spend/waste my money.

Portland's latest rendition of "The Cook, The Thief, His Wife and Her Lover"?

Look at the left column and tell us what other things need to be trashed.

Dear God, it really kills these guys to do their basic job - Good schools, reasonably priced utilities, safe roads/bridges and adequate police protection.

I really need a job like this where I can spend 95% of my time on make work projects I like to do like my hobbies.

Could this town PLEASE just shut the f**k up about bikes already?

Could this town PLEASE just shut the f**k up about bikes already?

Heat rash?

See, now you are just proving their point! We are all too ignorant to find cheese on our own. And, even if we could find cheese, we might not pick the cool, bicycle-related, pseudo-French cheese, which would lead to an absolute breakdown of the social fabric and a failure of the Portland "brand". Therefore, our good technocratic overloards need to have lots of enthusiastic young staff persons to educate us. If you were right-minded, you'd run out immediately and buy lots of cool, bicycle-related, pseudo-French cheese and like it.

So public-minded, PDX city gov.

So yesterday, I call a nearby public pool:
"hey, I have 2 kids, we're hot, can we come? the pools have such variable and limited hours for kids, I always call first."

Clerk says: "oh yeah, sure, well, but at 6.45 we have teen hours and noone under 11 can stay in the pool."

I say: "great! It's only 5.30, that gives us an hour, we'll be right down."

Get down there, oh, it's a mistake. There's no open swim time at all, until 6.45, when only teens can come in. There's an empty pool, it's 5.45, but no, we can't use the pool. 5 lifeguards are there at the counter, they stare at me when I make a fuss, one of them offers to
show me their printed schedule. Then another mom with two kids walks in. It starts to become a united front. I start to rant:
"it's obscene to limit the hours for kids to a couple of hours a day! People are dying of hyperthermia! There's an obesity epidemic!..Some parents have only a limited window of time to bring their kids swimming, and restricting the hours shuts out a lot of kids who need the exercise!..." They stare at me some more.

Then, a third, eight months pregnant, Latina mom walks in with several children; she almost starts to cry when she hears she might not get in to the pool, tells them how hot she is, please, let us in...

So, we got in. The lifeguards were irritated. They actually had to take turns on duty. 10 people relished in the water, then we were politely asked to leave at 6.40. It was all good.

Scary place, Portland. Seriously thinking about moving. North Carolina? Ireland? Germany? Slovenia? Or maybe I just need to become a hermit artist with my own pool and hold tango retreats for disillusioned city dwellers.

Nick Fish, are you hearing this? There are more people than the homeless who feel disaffected here, goddamit.

Another glaring example of elitism in City Hall.

The PDX population seems to consist of 90% or so disinterested or disenfranchised silent majority with about 10% elitist minority constantly spewing their own self-serving propaganda and tasty kool-aid.

Before long, someone down there is going say the rest of us can all just eat ash-cakes.

There's another critique angle about all the PR staff in every city bureau.

Director Susan Anderson of the Bureau of Planning & Sustainability demonstrates it well in this "french connection" piece. Gouchau Cellars, Urban Growth Bounty and Grand Central Baking are all touted by this taxpayer paid piece. What about all their competitors who are left out? Government should not be advocating for a few.

I have several friends in business here in Portland that are getting tired of their tax dollars paying for competitor advertising, or in direct competition to their products.

For example: the friends who have older apartments with modest rents in direct competition with all of Portland's tax subsidized affordable housing; the friend who is in direct competition with Grand Central Baking; the friend who roasts coffee but has glossy advertisements by the city espousing their competitor. The friend who has a health club but his competitor was awarded $5 Million in tax subsidies for a new health club.

Besides our Constitution having separation of church and state, we need separation of business and state.


I feel you pain. If we read this blog and the comments it seems like there are rational people in Portland. Unfortunately we just don't get an ear at city hall. Nick Fish is a big idiot. He hasn’t contributed a thing to the bureaus he manages. He is Mr. uber PC and has orgasms when any supposed homeless or minority street naming issue hits his desk. The parks in Portland have gone down the tube since Vera was mayor, except of course the ones in the Pearl. Perhaps some day this group of morons in city hall will alienate enough people to get them voted out.

Good Lord! What a bunch of elitist d**ks! I would like to attend the dinner, get roaring drunk and blanket the table with a 3 yard projectile spew. Oh, and I hope to show attired in cutoffs and a wife beater. I have been to Europe 3 times in the last 3 years and carefully avoided France each time. I certainly shall not pursue their nookshoden culture or food here in PDX!

Just once, can someone in City Hall, anybody, just cut out the Europhilia and the passionate cramming of all things pc down our throats, and actually fix one stinking pot hole, or maybe even put a stupid sidewalk in Cully? Or maybe just do something relating to making day to day life measurably better by getting the hell out of our lives or just get down off the high horse they ride? That whole article just reeks of elitism. The Portland way is to bike, eat cheese, and drink? I guess I'm too busy working and minding my own business to be real here by this metric.

I cannot wait until I finally have enough money to flee this nut house. My apologies to all nut houses for the comparison.

Tango retreats. Ummmmm! Sign me up!

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