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Sunday, December 14, 2008

Breaking news: Snow causes accidents

We now have some frightening reports from out on our area roads. The falling snow is not melting when it hits the pavement; instead, it is accumulating. This is causing the roads to become slick, and there have been some accidents. Accidents!

Repeating our top story: It is snowing, and there are now reports of auto accidents.

Stay in your home. Do not go outside for any reason. Stay tuned to bojack.org Storm Center 9000 for further updates.

Comments (8)

Jack, I'm not going to believe your story that the weather is bad until I see video of you shivering on a freeway overpass. I mean, what kind of a storm watch is this?

Oh my god, we are screwed. Only video would be more convincing!

Please Lord, deliver us from Dave Salesky.


I thought the new guy had to start out at Troutdale!


Twenty pounds of rock salt later and we have reestablished the pedestrian safety corridor around my front porch and driveway.

Tragedy and homeowners liability has been averted, with only minor shoveling and heart stress.

Now I only need concern myself with how wickedly off schedule Tri-Met's #12 is tomorrow.

I just got back from a walk and saw Jack on the freeway overpass. I must have been lucky to survive the past three hours outside. Okay, no more. Now that it's official, I'm staying indoors until Stormwatch 9000 says it's safe to go outside.

I wonder if I dare let the pooch out?

"... reestablished the pedestrian safety corridor ..."

Oxymoronic like 'reestablishing' military intelligence or gravity goes Up^, where the situation didn't exist in the first place, 'established.' Besides and even if peripatetics could be corridor-ed within rubber 'safety' walls, is seems unnecessary where there are no pedestrians, i.e., visitors to the home, or, bunker buddies dropping by; and it's probably impossible to relieve daily risk and danger any safer than the storm they walked out of to come visit. All of which reasoning may sound illogical to the legislated mind.

But I've come to critique Storm Watch 9000, not to praise the lord and pass the ammunition. Critique by contrast: The other Storm Watchers are about 7 leagues worse, still using the 2008 model or less. And they blog about themselves:

Weekend Open Thread, ZOMG IT'S GONNA SNOW Edition 12/12/08-12/14/08, Oregon Media Insiders.

Fri, 12/12/2008 - 12:25pm. --
So, it's about 11:30am.
Are any reporters posted at Sylvan Hill or on an overpass at I-84 yet?

bojack was SO totally ahead of that. Wie gehts the video?

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