Freedom to flick your Bic (Jack Bog's Blog)

Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert are funny, but they can't hold a candle to the comedy that comes out of the Cheney-Bush administration every day. The latest: The airport security people are going to start letting you bring cigarette lighters on airplanes again, because you could have always lit a bomb with matches or batteries, anyway. Besides, few of the TSA attendants smoke, and so there's no sense in their taking your lighter off you.

I don't smoke, but I may start bringing a lighter on board so that I can dump out the highly flammable material before heading to the airport and smuggle in some drinking water.

A guy named Kip Hawley, assistant secretary for the Transportation Security Administration, is quoted today as saying of the old prohibition: “Taking lighters away is security theater. It trivializes the security process.”

Similarly, scratching one's rear with a palm frond trivializes the gluteal itch abatement process. Kip, my man, what about the rest of it? Like the day a few months ago when they confiscated my three-year-old's play dough. We wouldn't want to trivialize that, huh, Kip old buddy? Getting out of the Denver airport a few weeks ago, the line was so long -- literally hundreds of fat, shiny Americans shuffling back and forth in the switchbacks waiting to take their nasty sweatshop tennis shoes and belts off -- it was like something out of the old "Outer Limits," only in color and smell-o-vision. I felt so much better to see that they were making the suicide bombers take their video cameras out of the cases.

The whole Cheney-Bush administration has been one big "security theater." We made bin Laden pour out his latte.

Comments (8)

Anyone who travels frequently sees how the TSA people are just going through the motions, earning $9/hour. Regarding those big lines, it seems like dumb luck that terrorists haven't just carted bombs into those lines and blown everybody up before they board their flights. What would we do if that happened? It would cripple the airline industry just as badly as if another plane got blown up. It's just sad how theatrical our "security" is.

Posted by jim | July 20, 2007 12:01 PM

I've never understood the arbitary number of ounces deemed allowable.
Because my 4oz saline bottle is much more dangerous than 3.2oz. Yep.

Posted by Hula | July 20, 2007 1:01 PM

it seems like dumb luck that terrorists haven't just carted bombs into those lines and blown everybody up before they board their flights.

In Denver they could take out hundreds if they just got to the middle of line and then detonated.

Posted by Jack Bog | July 20, 2007 1:49 PM

Once again, the Theatrical Security Administration does a heck of a job.

Posted by Alan DeWitt | July 20, 2007 2:09 PM

All the airline security apparatus is designed to do is remind you of your continuing peril as a traveler. This it does quite well.

Posted by Allan L. | July 20, 2007 2:20 PM

I fly fairly regularly, and I long ago decided I would rather take my chances with the terrorists than deal with TSA.

Life is a risk, and I'm cool with that.

Posted by Justin.morton | July 20, 2007 2:23 PM

"Life is a risk, and I'm cool with that."

That's all well and good, but why let the government off the hook on its primary function, to protect the people?

Posted by Allan L. | July 20, 2007 4:04 PM

To "protect the people" is NOT the primary function of governemt -- you're channelling fascist LIARS. The only place it's listed, (on cop cars) -- "to serve and protect" -- it comes in second, in this case: last.

Say it with us now, all together: Do ordain and establish our constituted sovereign States, in Unity, establishing Justice, promoting domestic tranquility, insuring our general well-being, and securing Liberty's blessings inherent.

There is ever only one provision for a common defense: Education informing you 'protect' yourself in what you do. It's called prophylaxis. It don't take you no army, and, in fact, an army takes you. Make sure you got someone's back. Then they got yours. That's the best there is.

Posted by Tenskwatawa | July 20, 2007 9:34 PM

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Friday, July 20, 2007

Freedom to flick your Bic

Comments (8)

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