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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on March 17, 2006 5:21 PM. The previous post in this blog was More property taxes for your! aerial! tram! [rim shot]. The next post in this blog is March Sadness. Many more can be found on the main index page or by looking through the archives.

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« More property taxes for your! aerial! tram! [rim shot] | Main | March Sadness »

Friday, March 17, 2006

Today's Joke Setup

Phil Collins and his young wife have announced that they're separating.

Punchlines, please.

Posted at 5:21 PM | Permalink

Comments (30)

It's terrible having old age creep up on you... every night.

Posted by Jack Bog | March 17, 2006 5:42 PM

Take a look at him now, there�s just an empty space, and her going back to him is against the odds, and that�s what he�s got to face.

Posted by Bill McDonald | March 17, 2006 7:30 PM

Didn't she learn anything from Anna Nicole Smith? You gotta stick it out until he kicks the bucket.

Posted by jason | March 17, 2006 8:23 PM

There�s this girl that�s been on my mind
All the time, Su-su-sue-your-ex.

Posted by Jack Bog | March 17, 2006 8:25 PM

Jack, aren't you really reaching far out here. This was news many days ago. Must be a slow day in P Town...

Posted by aaw | March 17, 2006 9:03 PM

It's in the paper today.

It's Friday night.

Posted by Jack Bog | March 17, 2006 9:17 PM

All jokes aside, Phil Collins is an amazing drummer. He may have gone saps-ville recently, but I doubt people realize how good a drummer he is.

I suggest any audiophile go and check out his stuff with the band Brand X. Rippin' stuff!

Posted by Chris McMullen | March 17, 2006 9:33 PM

Absolutely agree Chris; he has a fantastic talent. Have enjoyed him many years.

Posted by aaw | March 17, 2006 9:37 PM

Here's an amazing fact about Phil Collins: He was in the crowd for the theater scenes when the Beatles performed at the end of
"A Hard Day's Night."

Posted by Bill McDonald | March 17, 2006 9:38 PM

"I'll hide how much it's hurtin'" - Do You Know, Do You Care

"You're going nowhere without me" - Why Can't It Wait 'Till Morning

"But I don't remember / Take, take me home..." - Take Me Home

"That is why I want to testify" - Testify

"Ooh, it's all over / Ooh, it's all done" - It's Over

Posted by Chris | March 17, 2006 9:51 PM

I can't stand Phil.

Posted by Jack Bog | March 17, 2006 9:52 PM

I can't stand Phil any more, but Chris and aaw are right -- the man has (or at least had) some incredible chops. Old Genesis stuff was my favorite.

Posted by Ken | March 17, 2006 10:08 PM

Genesis is one thing. "Something in the Air Tonight" is quite another -- especially after the millionth time you hear it.

It's like McCartney -- the queen knighted him for what he did with the Beatles, then beheaded him for Wings.

Posted by Jack Bog | March 17, 2006 10:19 PM

Now, if we could only get Phil Collins and my radio to separate...

Posted by Alpal3 | March 17, 2006 10:30 PM

See that's what I was looking for. Thanks Al.

Posted by Chris Snethen | March 17, 2006 11:21 PM

Didn't he do a duet... "Separate Lives"?

Posted by Tk | March 17, 2006 11:29 PM

He seems to have an invisible spouse, yeah, she moves in and takes his wallet apart...

or better yet,

It's no fun, having a legal sep-ar-a-tion

or maybe

so, I see your suitcase, its got my silverware.
You know its all I have have left
From when I had my hair.
So see ya, a lit-tle later
The lawyers will get it it set
And no you shouldn't worry
My fourth wife is not born yet
Yes I'll see ya Mama
In my former backyard
Oh Oh....

Of all the things I wanted to say on this blog, THIS is what gets me to post. Please forgive my "creativity" its been a long day.

Posted by Rusty Shackleford | March 18, 2006 12:18 AM

Minor Tweaks says it all.
Missed again.

Posted by Alan Bluehole | March 18, 2006 6:56 AM

Their marriage took a bad turn when she refused to name their first child "Vodka."

Posted by Abe | March 18, 2006 8:10 AM

Jack, You think you can't stand Phil? You should hear how she feels about him.

Posted by Bill McDonald | March 18, 2006 8:15 AM

Who's Phil Collins?

Posted by Jim McLaughlin | March 18, 2006 8:40 AM

Phil Collins: The NEW Randy Newman for Disney cartoons...

Posted by TK | March 18, 2006 8:47 AM

Randy Newman is a genius. Phil Collins is... well, Phil Collins.

Posted by Jack Bog | March 18, 2006 2:14 PM

Randy Newman is a genius.

Normally I fast forward through the beginning titles and credits of shows I've Tivo'd. I ALWAYS play the beginning titles of "Monk" juat to listen to Randy Newman's "It's a Jungle Out There."

Randy Newman...genius indeed. Phil Collins? Not so much.

Posted by Frank Dufay | March 18, 2006 8:11 PM

C'mon already, Phil Collins sucks.

Bill McD, your first post was great.

Posted by Larry | March 18, 2006 9:38 PM

Gorbachev, minus the bird splat!

Posted by Jim Golden | March 19, 2006 5:24 AM

Randy Newman = the same 4 piano notes again and again while mumbling out of tune about nothing.

Phil Collins has one of the best catalogs of any career musician, even if the last 15 years have been crap. There aint much better than old Genesis, especially OLD Genesis, before Gabriel went solo.

Posted by Gullyborg | March 19, 2006 10:32 PM

Don't confuse Peter Gabriel's contributions to Genesis with Phil Collins's.

If you like junk like "Abacab" and "Sussudio" better than "Sail Away" or "Louisiana" by Randy Newman, there's not much I can do for you.

Posted by Jack Bog | March 20, 2006 6:25 AM

Don't lump all the Collins-led Genesis into the "Susudio" era (which wasn't even Genesis). Albums like Trick of the Tail and Duke totally kick butt. I can't stay awake while listening to anything by Randy Newman, whose essence was best captured as the raving idiot playing piano on a Family Guy episode.

Posted by Gullyborg | March 20, 2006 3:14 PM

Chris was right, Brand X was unreal. Tell ya, Jack. there just aren't that many people who can play that stuff. I mean, it was really hard to pull off. Talented drummer. Short, but talented.

mazoc

Love Randy too, the reason his voice sounds so garbled is that he has his tongue wedged soo far in his cheek.

Posted by john Mazzocco | March 20, 2006 3:39 PM

In Vino Veritas

David Hill, Reserve Merlot, Rogue Valley 2006
Educated Guess, Cabernet 2006
Maquis Lien, Red 2005
Charles Smith, Kung Fu Girl Riesling 2007
David Hill, Farmhouse White
Robert Mondavi Solaire, Cabernet 2005
Castello Monaci, Liante, Salice Salentino 2006
Ricardo Santos, Malbec 2006
Quinta da Espiga, Tinto 2006
Charles Smith, Holy Cow Merlot 2006
Charles Smith, Boom Boom Syrah 2006
Charles Smith, The Honorable Pinot Gris 2007
Santa Rita, Cabernet Reserva 2005
King Estate, Pinot Gris 2007
Gloria, Douro, Tinto 2002
Bogle, Petite Sirah Port, Clarksburg 2005
Cardwell Hill, Pinot Noir 2004
Silkwood, Red Duet Cabernet-Syrah 2004
Portuga, Vinho Branco 2006, 2007
Osborne, Solaz 2004
Santa Rita, Cabernet, Reserva 2005
Penfold's, Koonunga Hill, Shiraz Cabernet 2006
Chateau Ste. Michelle, Cabernet, Indian Wells 2004
Chateau Ste. Michelle, Merlot, Horse Heaven Hills 2004
Hannah Nicole, Red 2004
Penfold's, Koonunga Hill Shiraz Cabernet 2005
Protocolo, Red 2005
Woodbridge, Chardonnay 2006
Portuga, Vinho Branco 2006
Beaulieu, Cabernet, Rutherford 1998
Beaulieu, Cabernet, Rutherford 1996
Kirkland, Roogle Shiraz 2004
Garda, Classico Chiaretto
A to Z, Oregon Pinot Gris 2005
I Giusti & Zanza, Nemorino 2006
Treana, Marsanne-Viognier, Central Coast 2005
Fife, Syrah, "Stanford" 2000
B.R. Cohn, Silver Label Cabernet 2005
Marques de Casa Concha, Cabernet 2005
Santi, Sortesele Pinot Grigio 2006
Al Muvedre, Tinto Joven 2006
Layer Cake, Shiraz 2006
Gritti, Ca' Andrea, Umbria red 2005
Altos de Luzon, Jumilla 2004
Thomas Leithner, Zweigelt 2004
Cain Cuvee NV 3
Chateau Ste. Michelle, Merlot 2003
Meridian, Sauvignon Blanc 2005
Canoe Ridge, Merlot 2003
Paringa, Shiraz 2005
King Estate, Pinot Gris 2005
Canoe Ridge, Merlot 2003
Maculan, Pino & Toi 2005
Kris, Pinot Grigio 2006
Silvan Ridge, Pinot Gris 2006
Fife, Mendocino Syrah, "Stanford" 2000
Castle Rock, Cabernet, Paso Robles 2005
Willakenzie, Pinot Gris 2006
The Show, Cabernet 2005
Essencia Valdemar, Rioja Rose 2006
Chateau Ste. Michelle, Merlot, Horse Heaven Hills 2004
Beaulieu Vineyard. Napa Valley Cabernet 2004
Irony, Cabernet, Napa Valley 2003
Rosenblum, Petite Sirah, Heritage Clones 2005
Fra Guerau, Montsant 2002
Barefoot Chardonnay
Kana, Syrah 2004
Castell Salegg, Chardonnay, Alto Adige 2004
Fetish, The Watcher Shiraz 2004
Gold Note, Fair Play Zinfandel 2005
Chateau Ste. Michelle, Canoe Ridge Estate Cabernet 2003
Ponzi, Pinot Noir 2004
Red Diamond, Merlot 2003
Mateus, Rose
Benton Lane Pinot Noir 2004
Penya Cadiella Vins de Comtat 2003
Kamiak, Cellar Select Red 2003
Anselmi, San Vincenzo 2005
Rubrato, Aglianico dei Feudi di San Gregorio 2004
Le Grand Noir (Black Sheep) Cabernet-Shiraz
Woodbridge, Chardonnay 2005
Los Vascos, Cabernet, Reserve 2004
Jackaroo, Shiraz 2003
Paul Jaboulet Aine, Crozes Hermitage Syrah, "La Jalet," 2001
Paul Jaboulet Aine, Cotes du Rhone, "Parallele '45,'" 2003
Rolf Binder, Barossa Valley Shiraz 2003
Oyster Bay, Sauvignon Blanc 2006
Woodbridge Chardonnay 2005
Barnard & Griffin, Columbia Valley Cabernet 2004
Quinto do Carmo, Alentejano Red 2000
Forefathers, Alexander Valley Cabernet 2001

The Occasional Book

Oscar Hijuelos - Mr. Ives' Christmas
Madeline L'Engle - A Wrinkle in Time
Steven Hart - The Last Three Miles
David Sedaris - Me Talk Pretty One Day
Karen Armstrong - The Spiral Staircase
Charles Larson - The Portland Murders
Adrian Wojnarowski - The Miracle of St. Anthony
William H. Colby - Long Goodbye
Steven D. Stark - Meet the Beatles
Phil Stanford - Portland Confidential
Rick Moody - Garden State
Jonathan Schwartz - All in Good Time
David Sedaris - Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim
Anthony Holden - Big Deal
Robert J. Spitzer - The Spirit of Leadership
James McManus - Positively Fifth Street
Jeff Noon - Vurt

Road Work

Miles run year to date: 28
At this date last year: 102
Total run in 2007: 113
In 2006: 100
In 2005: 149
In 2004: 204
In 2003: 269